There is this problem
And it's kept on the hush-hush
Most everybody's seen it

But they just don't discuss (it!)
It affects about 30 percent
Of the male population
The healing won't begin
Until we have frank communication!
Ring, ding, dong...
Ringity-ding da ding dong...
Ring, ding, dong...
Ringity-ding da ding dong (get their heads ringing)
Please understand
That this problem hits home
I speak from the heart
'Cause I'm convinced I'm not alone!
When I was thirteen
And got interested in girls
I looked between my eyebrows
And I noticed some curls (boing!)
How did I get here
In this awkward position?
My two eyebrows
Have formed a coalition...
Out of the blue
My eyebrows grew
Now there's one
Where there once was two
Holy cow!
Gotta stop this somehow
Things are gettin' hairy!
Gotta end it now...
My unibrow!
(Ha! A-huh! Huh! Huh! A-huh! A-huh! A-huh! Huh!)
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
It's gettin' drastic!
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
Shave it, pluck it, wax it
It's gettin' drastic!
Pluck it, pluck it, pluck it
Shave it
Wax it
Pluck it, pluck it
Shave it, shave it
Wax it
Pluck it, pluck it, pluck it
Shave it
Wax it
Pluck it, pluck it
Shave it, shave it
Wax it, wax it, wax it, wickety wickety wickety wax it