Intro 1 (Big Cat):
Hey Sully...is that you? Oh yea it is. You cat killin motherfucker! Ha Ha Ha
Intro 2 (Nate Dogg):
I kicked you the fuck out of the office then you got kicked the FUCK out of the company!
You don't even have Bitcoin Michael Rapaport
You use exclusively 90's slang, and the kids DON'T LIKE YOU
Verse 1 (Rone):
Michael Rapaport you fucking 10 gallon drum of curdled milk. You fuckin busted pussy. Get the fuck out of here...
Aye Rap I’m back and I’m still that dude
And I’ve got bad news mike I Kill cats too
I’ll beat Rapaport to applesauce You fuck you
All your rants are just jacking off, so you fuck you
Rapaport I’m not here for the back and forth
You better play it safe fore Lily Taylor brings you back in court
Shoulda been a stain on a motel’s Davenport
All that white guilt has got you sounding like Macklemore
Listen Michael Rap I’d rather get a spinal tap
Go out to neverland ranch and sit in michael’s lap
You sullied your career with that monster on your chin
Plus you Talk a lot of shit for a Walking blob of jizz
Couldn’t make it as a stand up
Couldn’t make it as an actor
Couldn’t make it on podcast
Couldn’t make it as a director
You couldn’t make it anywhere
And we despise you cuz
But We can’t make you go away
What’s that remind you of
You’re not hood you live with the day traders
You’ll still be a race baiter when you’ve got a pacemaker
You act hard but upper east side’s where you rep
Thats barely in the hood like Kevin Garnett
The most fake twitters accounts on the globe
More burners than an industrial stove
He’s a snake oil salesman with nothing to sell
Wanna be down so bad, he’d start cutting himself
You look like a puddle of pudding in every picture
You look like you might be larry bird’s mom’s sister
You act like act like kenny powers but uglier and sicker
‘cept i always saw You more as a catcher than a pitcher
How you live like a ho but act so mean
How you so washed up but never look clean
And please, let’s not fucking forget
You dated Phoebe and SHE was the ugliest Friend
YO There’s not one medium that you sound good on
You’ve burned every bridge that you’ve ever set foot on
And this is straight at your chest no indirects
I just killed the worst person on the internet
Verse 2 (Davey Pageviews):
FUCK Michael Raaaaport, you should've left it alOHHN
Time to remind you I own the Iron Throne
Marshamallow Man, Lawyered up bitch
Hope the girls you gave the herp to don't snitch!
Verse 3 (KFC):
The whites dont want you, the blacks dont want you
That order of protection she dropped will still haunt you
The Race bating shit, photoshops of fuckin dave
Even Phife dawg is rolling over in his grave
1998 restraining order
Shoulda taught ya
To close your mouth and know your fuckin role
Once Davey bought ya
Career on life support you might as well go and retire
But you had to go and run your mouth
And now you gotta feel this fire
You say you dont fact check
So let me break it down
100 thousand in the bank cause
You're a motherfuckin clown
Fronting like you talk that shit
Like you can go and tear up
Only flames that come up out your mouth
Is when you have a flare up
Old racist man always lookin for a fight
Let you in on a secret mike, YOU'RE WHITE
The blacks dont want you, the whites dont want you
That order of protection she dropped will still haunt you
The Race bating shit, the photoshops of fuckin dave
Even Phife dawg is rolling over in his grave
Interlude 1( Nate Dogg):
Nobody has said Playa Hata since 1997! You 75 year old herpe having motherfuckin piece of shiiiIIIIIIT!
Verse 4 (KMarko):
Email me on the side asking "Can I help you better"
Bitch, you ain't relevant enough to make my newsletter
Please please, Mr Keith, pretty please give me some love
But with Twitter fingers on actin like you're pretty tough
Like you're a superstar who needs no help with his fame
Put a rant up on my blog get zero clicks to your name
Cause nobody's cared about you since you tried to move with Phoebe
Herpes-havin motherfucker givin girls the heebie jeebies
So you stalk them, harass them, tap all on their windows
Bit parts in 5 movies is that still your only win though?
"My bank account is big, my bank account is poppin"
So's that sore up on your face with all that puss on top it - bitch
Verse 5 (Francis):
I’m Michael Rapaport, and I’m here to say
You’re a racist motherfucker and you’re probably gay
I’ve been in over 60 movies, I’ve been spreading my seed
Like Shaggy and Scoobie, I never get any leads
If you take every scene from every movie I’ve done
Put them back to back and you just let the tape run
You grab a hold of your dick and try to empty your plums
I guarantee the tape will finish long before you have cum
Done lots of TV, White Famous for example
Like a pop up on your laptop, I’m always getting cancelled
King of talking trash, real thin skin though
If you break up with me, I’ll come knocking at your window!
Interlude 2 (Nate Dogg):
Remember when that shark ate you? I watch it all the time. Cause you're dead and you're dead to me. You shouldn't have shot that bird on Friends. GET THE FUCK OUT!
Verse 6 (PFT):
You act like youre from the corner but who’s fooling who
You ain't richard sherman but you got a lesion of doom
You called me TV dinner well my shits amuse bouche
Put it all in your mouth even though your lips need a douche
Lost your job, you got the blues, but I’m the king like bb
Your busted face so ugly you had to settle for Phoebe
You talk a big game but you’re old dumb and fat
The only pussy that you slay is a calico cat
Your wife’s gonna bounce and i dont blame her i’d leave ya
So take the money you owe Smitty and invest in Abreva
Interlude 3 (Zah):
::Zimbabwe Curse::
Verse 6 (Smitty):
Hold up wait a minute. Ya'll thought I was finished?
I won't let that perp with herp think that he is winning
Dude your a loser, you're the cracker honkey
You got put in a cage by our office Spider Monkey
Your takes are outrageous. Your act is ostentatious
That shit on your face is beyond Stage-5 contagious
You think you're a tough guy taking haters for a ride?
You grew up spinning dreidels on the Upper East Side
You look like a chemo Yertle the turtle
Shooting blanks on Twitter like Portnoy the infertile
You're all bark and no bite. A fraud and a hack
The only place you're tough is on the internet and behind people's backs
And if you wanna go IRL just come at me trying to flex
I'll end up making you look as black and blue as your ex
Crazy part is I drove you insane. I can offer some of my juice to stop breaking your brain