I had not taken acid for twelve years
But one-night last summer I did
I was adrift in a barroom
Acting like a jerk and a kid

I knew we were asking for trouble
Trouble was what we would get
Five of us dropped in the girls' room
Psycadilisized insane quintet

Well that bathroom got crowded in no time
Our minds were all blown in one flash
Everyone in there got ugly
We exited out of there fast

Back in the bar, we were happy
Feeling great, no problem
Back in the bar, we were fine
Till Johnny turned into a Nazi
And Mary threw up all her wine

Well in no time we all were ejected
Soon we were out on the street
The sidewalk began to perspire
We had glass and dog shit at our feet
We went over to Mary's apartment
"Come on!"
To listen to the Grateful Dead
On the way there we lost Johnny
He had opted for Bellevue instead

"Well I'm really glad we did this, it feels great
Just like the old days, I love this
I know my hair's on fire, it's like incense or something
You know, your face is melting
It is, it's all the colors of the rainbow
Hey, you wanna hold some fruit?
Come on, hold some fruit!
It breeds, it really does!
Have a cantaloupe, come on
Ah, no I dunno where the Donovan tape is."

Well I had to get out of that city
Bobby was bringing me down
Me and my darling young Susie
Said so long and drove out of town

Driving on acid is easy
Driving on acid's a breeze
Just keep the car on the highway
Don't laugh and don't fart and don't sneeze
Oh we got to my house in the country
In the countryman
The trees were all throbbing and green
Susie was sure she had cancer
I was sure I was James Dean

We went down the lake to go swimming
"Come on let's try it out"
Down to the lake for a swim
Susie said, "Water cures cancer"
I asked her to please call me Jim

Yes acid is usually dangerous
The mild-mannered can quickly turn mean
LSD can surely derange us
Unless you possess Thorazine

So next time you wanna go out there
When you feel like fitting your head
Think twice before dropping acid
Hold out for mushrooms instead!