This is Seymour Schwartz reporting for WJOO
I'm outside the residence of Michael Jackson
All these meshuganas are throwing flowers at his house
And what's the big deal?
He used to be a handsome black man
Now he looks like a holocaust survivor

Celebrities been dying everyday
I think it started with the death of Michael Jackson
Then that Charlie's Angel
Than Billy Mays

He's in all those commercials
His sales have doubled since he died
I'd like to offer some advice

You washed up celebs
You'll have your comeback when you die
That's why I'm thinking...

Celebrities
Should commit suicide, yeah!
Take your own life
You'll be a legend just like Biggie
Or his buddy, 2Pac, man
Biggie, and 2Pac are
The Patrick Swayzes of hip-hop
You should just blow your head off
Like Kurt Cobain
Or that guy, JFK
They shot his ass in the face

My autopsy's
Sceduled for next friday
Look at the slaes
We selling Bernie Mac

Hi, kids
My name is Michael
Never had a childhood
(Cookies)
Too busy working
I could sing like I found Jesus
Hey there, kids!
Have you seen my Penis?
Come here, blanket
Let me spank it
Without kids, we'd be extinct
I could buy anything
I bought the Beatles
I need needles to put me to sleep
I'm home alone!
Oh no, I'm scared
Macaulay, come over and hold me
Here, come ride my ferris whee
Milk and cookies
(Cookies)
I have a chimp named Bubbles
He likes to cuddle
And never says no
National Many Boy
Love Asscociation
Said they are sad
About the death of Michael Jackson
Now he's deader than disco
Most them pedophiles
Just go and work for the UN

You should just blow your head off
Like Kurt Cobain
Or that guy MLK
Killed by the white government

My autopsy's sceduled for next friday
Look at the sales
We sellin' Patrick Swayze

Stephanie Tanner diappeared
And then she was like
"Hey, I quit moking meth and no one cares"
That's why I'm thinkin'...

Celebrities
Should commit suicide, yeah!
Take your own life
You'll be a legend just like Biggie
Or his buddy 2Pac, man
2Pac and Biggy
Are the Patrick Swayzes of hip-hop
You should just blow your head off
Like Kurt Cobain
Or that guy JFK
They shot his ass in the head

My autopsy's
Sceduled for next friday
Look at the sales
We sellin' Bernie Mac

How rude!