[Chorus]
Haiti had a little bit of a earthquake
Everyone calm down, we don't even live there (We live here)
Oh my God it's a earthquake, check your butt for butthole AIDS
Haiti needs some hamburgers and a milkshake
Can you spare 10 bucks? Come on give it to 'em
'Cause they had a bad earthquake, need some band-aids and corn flakes

[Verse 1]
'Cause they've been wastin' the last 500 years in their underwear playin' in the sand (No pants)
We said put some clothes on, they was like "No", now a earthquake took their ass out (So sad)
We gave them a little bit food and kidnapped a quarter million kids
Y'all come with us, don't be scared it's cool, you won't never see your parents again (They're dead)

[Pre-Chorus]
(You know)
Now I'm thinkin' while we over there
(We should)
Lay down a couple states
(Yessir)
Y'all just wait 'til I'm president
I'm gonna run shit a whole new way

[Chorus]
Yeah, Germans they're lesbians and have AIDS, listen up everyone I ain't playin' witchu
Are we done fightin' Germany? Are we done with Germany?
No, Germans seem to really like startin' shit but it's cool 'cause it's not like they ever win
"But we did kick France's ass"
Yes you did, but who did not?
[Verse 2]
Okay Germans started up World War I then they was like "Whoops my bad"
We said it's okay then a couple years later, they start a world war again
They killed like a million Jews and then they killed another five million
I think we should take them all to school and just blow they ass up right now

[Pre-Chorus]
Fuck y'all
"Nein please don't blow us up"
Get fucked
"But it was only a game"
Y'all suck
"But we won't do it anymore"
You'll never eat a weinerschnitzel again

[Chorus]
Yeah, Spanish people sound like they should be brown, but you go to Spain and everyone is white
We should make them change their name or we could send them Mexicans
Yeah, Norway doesn't really do anything, we can't really trust them I don't think
Scottish people talk funny, Irish people swing from trees

[Verse 3]
When I'm president, we gonna carpet bomb some French cities
And because they all speak French, we gonna also bomb Quebec
(Wee wee)
And if Korean boy wanna mess with me, then I'ma nuke his ass and say "Ninja please"
And if they keep fuckin' 'round in the Middle East, they just mad 'cause their mamas are Lesbaneses
Then I'm gonna bomb everyone whose name ends with "istan"('Cause they all stupid)
I'm gonna blow up China 'cause they eat little dogs
[Chorus]
Haiti had a little bit of a earthquake
Everyone calm down, we don't even live there (We live here)
Oh my God it's a earthquake, check your butt for butthole AIDS
Haiti needs some hamburgers and a milkshake
Can you spare 10 bucks? Come on give it to 'em
'Cause they had a bad earthquake

[Outro]
Hey man at least they didn't get raped
Wait what? Oh, they did?
Oh, well then
Someone should give them money