[Adam Carolla]
Kiss my rich ass

[Intro]
What's up bitches?
Rucka Rucka Ali
Hahaha
Ace Man
Ace Man
Giovanni Giorgio
With the cornrows
Hoes watch your cornholes
It's Dawson
Later ?
Yo Teresa
Weezle
We coming from the streets

Let's learn the history
Of that guy Adam Carolla from MTV
Who?
His parents smoked the dope and bought
Chip for cheap
He dropped out of junior college
Lived with like seven guys
In a crack house
One bedroom
His buddy Ray squirted from his ass
His buddy Chris pissed past the cloud
Their landlord slept in the basement
With a gun
And headphones
So he won't wakе up and shoot
Jimmy Kimmel was like
"Black guys don't ski very good"
Thе janitor was like
"Yo man I heard what you said
You just a broke motherfucker
I got my boys on the phone
We about to run fucking bullets
Through your bitch ass
Bitch n***a
Fuck your life"

So Adam walked in and said
"Ayo Jimmy you could whoop his ass
I know karate shit
Yo call me up if you tryna
Has me come fuck round on your show
????"

Kevin & Bean
Ace Man
Made some crank calls
(This is Birchum. I'm a guinea. Dago.)
Jimmy Kimmel jackoff in the bathtub
And made Adam sat in there with his jizz all around him

Adam had to work hard and be poor
He always had his folks support (Oh yeah)
He complained like a starving jew
And that's when he met Dr Drew (N***a fo Chizzy)
Went on Loveline
Stepped on toes
And Riki was gone
Ace landed The Man Show
It had tits and assholes
And then it was cancelled
Thanks Doug Stanhope
Who?
And then he made Crank Yankers
(Hello, who is this? Yay!)
He's the voice of death
And the pig on that show
And he probably also fucked Julianne Hough

Howard thought himself to be the Jesus of radio
And went over to Sirius
Adam said he's leaving Loveline
So he can start doing mornings
And then Loveline's fucking audience
Cried and scream
And fucking hung themselves

Dave Dameshek made fun of Asians (Oh Herro)
Hirohito tried to get all of them canned (Oh, Hell no!)
Adam was like
"I didn't say anything"
He won't admit
All Asian countries hates each other
Adam tried
Bonaduce a bit
But he wouldn't be quite
So then he got the bullet
Teresa and Bald Bryan
Holding it down from then on
Bald Bryan's the fucking man
He's had a tumor

Oh well
One day the voice upstairs said
Fuck all this Tom Leykis shit
Let's pander to women
Oh
Carson Daly ruined it
Late night TV's not enough
Lets give him mornings too

Adam took the millions he made from The Hammer
And make his show a podcast
And with the help from his dedicated crew
And his dedicated fans
And a black guy
The podcast now is the number one podcast ever
Ever
And if you don't listen to the podcast yet

We gonna come fuck you up motherfucker
You know who the fuck I am?
Rucka Rucka Ali
Rucka's Nuckas bow down to motherfuckin' speakers
And break your fucking face bitch
Bitch ass n***a
With your left turn ass arrow bullshit
I am tired of that shit
I ain't stopping at anymore left red turn arrows
This is America
Motherfucker
I am trying to raise a generation of patriots