You have been the only one I ever dream about
Even though I haven't seen you in a while
I can still remember how it felt when seeing you walk past me
In comparison to when I was the one to make you smile
But the here and now is lonesome howbeit I found some arms
That makes the pain go away, but it doesn't last long
Because they're on to the next one after we've shared a bout of sleep
Which fully illustrates the fact that they don't care about me
And It's pitiable how I'm so jealous of a mirage
When you told me what you see this as and to that I responded with
Okay, I agree because we know that is best
But my heart and mind is sequestered from my head and my chest
A text could make or break the way I'm feeling in the center
Depending on what it says and depending who was the sender
I wonder how they see me or if even remember
The tenderness I exhibited when we were together
So now I'm picking up the peddles of the flowers to see
If she loves me or not. The stem is left so that tells me a lot
It's the love or lust conundrum and it's cumbersome plot
While under the spell of some of them while others I'd watch
I keep replaying in my head that rare moment of bliss
When I fell asleep in your bed and You woke me up with a kiss
It was joyous and I felt cared for as if I existed for once
But was not at all prepared to be thrown off a cliff
This split my heart down the middle like the many times prior
But the night when this occurred it truly made me feel alive
I'd swan dive head first into the chance if it was given
Desperation makes mistakes worthwhile
Deny conditions when the problem is exerted attention to find women who are needless
I only need myself to make a difference
As the pressures of the common day continuously beat upon the mind and body, I would like a breast for me to lean on
The open ear and soothing voice is lenitive and welcome
But that's almost never present as I'm always by myself
And writing these accounts bring more light upon the darkness
And the pen that the writes the thoughts of mine really truly help
I thought I had it all within the palm of my hand
But it came along with qualms to the point I couldn't stand the
Overthinking, disappointment and reminders of the 'then'
And to top it all of those fucking issues of abandonment
I took a chance and ran with it and look where I got
Worn down with guilt feelings and a stomach in knots
There is a starting over but it's hard to accomplish
Why not? At this point that I should give it a shot