[Verse 1]
In your little black book
You've got the names
And the favourite persuasions
Of the people in the headlines
I'm in there under A
And I'm rated under B
You've got photographs to prove it
And I swear to God it's not me
You've got a hard heart
Being hard is your art
You think love is a dirty dirty word
You pick up the phone
And you ring me when I'm at home
And then you put it down
And I'm reaching for my valium

[Chorus]
My secret life
Living life
On a knife edge of life
Tell my wife
And she's just had a breakdown
And I
I'm not rich
But you know I'm top in my pitch
And you'll ruin the lot
Finish everything I've got
My secret life
Secret life
[Post-Chorus]
I'll give you anything
Anything to shut you up
Why do you hate me so much
What have I ever done to you
But leave you

[Verse 2]
I don't want to play
Cat and Mouse
Have the neighbours looking over at my house
All the secret smiles
When I walk in the room
And I think I'm going to
Crack up soon
I'm going to run away
Find a place in the dark
Where I don't have to hear
The nasty nasty talk
Change my sex
Change my hair
Be hard to find anywhere

[Chorus]
My secret life
Living life
On a knife edge of life
Tell my wife
And she's just had a breakdown
And I
I'm not rich
But you know I'm top in my pitch
And you'll ruin the lot
Finish everything I've got
My secret life
Secret life
[Post-Chours]
I'll give you anything
Anything to shut you up
Why do you hate me so much
What have I ever done to you
But leave you

[Outro]
My secret life
My secret life
My secret life
My secret life
My secret life