[Intro]
I be on my stupid tie, shit tie, shit (check it)
Clashes with my suit, this tie, shit tie, shit
Let me show you I'm goofy
Gonna quote some bad movies
Wait a minute
Are you ready, Office Funny Guy?

[Verse 1]
I can't wait 'til I get on the floor at the water cooler
Lookin' real hot, roll up on my mini scooter
And ow! Raggin' on the boss, oh I'm so clever
I'm on fire
From 9 to 5
Hey buddy, check out my ironic calendar
Remember Office Space? "Mmmmm, my stapler."
Oooh, party in the kitchen, didn't get an invitation
I'm on fire
Till I retire

[Chorus]
And as long as I've got my stupid tie
I'mma be the office funny guy
Wearing Converse and my mug is fly
Let me show you a few things
Desk all dressed, my toys are tight
Action figures of the shows I like
Playing mad pranks on my deskmate Mike
Let me show you a few things
Let me show you a few things
Show you a few things about fun
Yeah, you know my shirt's a pun
Let me send you a few links
Send you a few links
From The Onion
[Spoken]
Yeah, this office is full of characters, man. Check out my boy, JP. He's into mad lifehackin' and shit

[Verse 3]
Uh huh!
Standin' desk at my job, yo
Five fingers on my 10 toes
After lunch I brush my teeth
And my Nalgene BPA-free
French press at my desk, yes
White noise help me destress
Makin' rainbows with my Livestrong bracelets
Do I got a foldin' bike? Check

[Chorus]
And as long as I've got my stupid tie
You ain't gettin' any work done, guy
I'm doin' improv on Tuesday night
We're called the High Jinx
Every day a big Nerf war
Your secret Santa gift is porn
Happy hour's what I live for
Gonna have a few drinks
Gonna have a few drinks
Have a few drinks and get drunk
My nephew taught me to crunk
Gonna hit on my boss
Gonna hit on my boss
Well, I'm fired
I'm fired