[Verse 1]
When you walked in
I said with a grin
That we were just talking about you
We all had to lie
Because you would cry
If you knew we were laughing at you
In the momentary lull before the band begins to play
There's an overwhelming stench of alibi

[Chorus x2]
Come on now, now
Come on now, now
Enjoy the humor of the situation

[Verse 2]
I said on the phone
Don't wait until I'm home
But I'm sure I could here you crying
I said where I was
But you doubt it because
It's the caller ID your buying
In the hour that it took for me to drive up to the door
You'd arranged all my belongings on the lawn

[Chorus x2]
[Bridge]
Have you heard the one about the boy
Who moved into the hen house to sleep?
He woke up with egg on his face
When he found out all the hens had crossed the street

[Chorus x2]

[Verse 3]
As I walked out
I thought about
All I had left behind me
I felt a chill
Because I was still
Wearing the emperor's new clothes
My mind was racing
With each chance that I had missed
While the next door neighbor
Soaked me with the hose
I've never felt so small
I've never been so dissed
As I shivered dripping while the chorus goes:

[Chorus x3]