Stephen Schwartz
Thank Goodness*
[CITIZENS OF OZ]
Ev'ry day, more wicked
Ev'ry day, the terror grows
All of Oz is ever on alert
That's the way with Wicked
Spreading fear where e'er she goes
Seeking out new victims she can hurt
[A HYSTERICAL WOMAN]
Like some terrible green blizzard
Throughout the land she flies
[AN OUTRAGED MAN]
Defaming our poor Wizard
With her calumnies and lies
[ALL]
She lies
Save us from the Wicked
Shield us so we won't be hexed
Give us warning:
Wherе will she strike next?
Whеre will she strike next?
Where will she strike next?
[GLINDA]
Fellow Ozians—as terrifying as terror is, let us put
Aside our panic for this one day, and celebrate!
Oh what a celebration we'll have today
[CROWD]
Thank Goodness!
[GLINDA]
Let's have a celebration the Glinda way!
[CROWD]
Thank Goodness!
[MADAM MORRIBLE]
Fin'lly a day that's totally Wicked-Witch free!
[CROWD]
We couldn't be happier
Thank Goodness!
[GLINDA]
Yes, we couldn't be happier
Right, dear?
Couldn't be happier
Right here
Look what we've got, a fairy-tale plot
Our very own happy ending
Where we couldn't be happier
True, dear?
Couldn't be happier
And we're happy to share
Our ending vicariously with all of you
He couldn't look handsomer
I couldn't feel humbler
We couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your dreams come true!
[MADAM MORRIBLE]
Oh, and Glinda dear, we're happy for you!
As Press Secretary, I have striven to ensure that all of Oz
Knows the story of your braverism:
The day you were first summoned
To an audience with Oz
And although he would not tell you why initially
When you bowed before his throne
He decreed you'd hence be known
As Glinda the Good, officially!
Then with a jealous squeal
The Wicked Witch burst from concealment
Where she had been lurking surrep'titially!
[PEOPLE IN THE CROWD]
I hear she has an extra eye
That always remains awake
I hear that she can shed her skin
As easily as a snake!
I hear some rebel Animals
Are giving her food and shelter!
I hear her soul is so unclean
Pure water can melt her!
[FIYERO]
What!?
[CROWD]
Melt her!
Please, somebody go and melt her!
[FIYERO]
Do you hear that? Water will melt her?!
People are so empty-headed, they'll believe anything!
[GLINDA]
Fiyero! Oh, yes, thanks plenty, dearest!
He's gone to fetch me a refreshment
He's so thoughtful that way!
That's why I couldn't be happier
No, I couldn't be happier
Though it is, I admit
The tiniest bit
Unlike I anticipated
But I couldn't be happier
Simply couldn't be happier
Well, not "simply"
'Cause getting your dreams
It's strange, but it seems
A little, well, complicated
There's a kind of a sort of cost
There's a couple of things get lost
There are bridges you cross
You didn't know you crossed
Until you've crossed
And if that joy, that thrill
Doesn't thrill like you think it will
Still, with this perfect finale
The cheers and the ballyhoo
Who wouldn't be happier?
So I couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your dreams come true
Well, isn't it?
Happy is what happens
When your dreams come true!
[CROWD]
We love you, Glinda, if we may be so frank
[GLINDA]
Thank Goodness!
[CROWD]
For all this joy, we know who we've got to thank
Thank Goodness!
That means the Wizard, Glinda
[GLINDA]
And fiancé!
[CROWD]
They couldn't be goodlier
She couldn't be lovelier
We couldn't be luckier
[GLINDA]
I couldn't be happier
[CROWD]
Thank Goodness
[GLINDA & CROWD]
Today!
Thank Goodness for today!