[Verse 1: Toxxxic & Wilbur Soot]
I really can't stay (But baby, it's cold outside)
I gotta go away (Well, I can lift you a ride)
This evening has been (Been hoping that you'd drop by)
So very nice (I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice)
My mother will start to worry (Well, I can tell the lift to hurry)
My father will be pacing the floor (Well, haven't I met your dad before?)
So really, I'd better scurry (Your lift's name is Murray)
But maybe just another game more (Put some records on while I pour)
The neighbors might think (Baby, it's bad out there)
Maybe I'll have one more drink (No cabs to be had out there)
I wish I knew how (Don't know what to do now) to break the spell
I'll take your hat (Thank you!), your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no sir (Mind if I move closer?)
At least I'm gonna say I tried (What's the sense in hurtin' my pride?)

[Chorus: Toxxxic, Wilbur Soot, & Both]
I really can't stay (Well, baby, don't hold out!)
Baby, it's cold outside

[Post-Chorus: Toxxxic & Wilbur Soot]
You're very pushy, y'know?
Fine, okay, just text me when you get home, I guess
Wait, Wilbur, what?

[Verse 2: Toxxxic & Wilbur Soot]
Simply must go
Oh, we're still singing? Uh... (Yeah!) It's cold outside!
Supposed to say, "No"
How lucky that you dropped by (Read the fucking lyrics, thank you!)
The welcome has been so nice and warm (Look out the window at that storm)
My sister will be suspicious (Gosh, your lips look delicious)
My brother will be there at the door (Like waves upon a tropical shore)
My maiden aunt's mind is vicious (Gosh, your lips are delicious)
Well, maybe just a cigarette more (I don't even smoke!)
I've got to get home (But baby, you'll freeze out there)
Say, lend me a coat (It's up to your knees out there)
You've really been grand (I feel when I touch on your hand)
But don't you see? (How could you do this thing to me?) Wilbur!
There's bound to be talk tomorrow (Think of my lifelong sorrow)
At least there will be plenty implied (If you caught pneumonia and died)
[Chorus: Toxxxic, Wilbur Soot, & Both]
I really can't stay (Get over that cold out!)
Baby, it's cold, baby, it's cold outside

[Post-Chorus: toxxxicsupport]
Weren't you on Love or Host? Like, why are you—
Wilbur? Wilbur?