âYOU can just take that back, boy!â
This order, given by me to Cecil Jacobs was the beginning of a rather thin time for Jem and me. My fists were clenched and I was ready to let fly. Atticus had promised me he would wear me out if he ever heard of me fighting any more; I was far too old and too big for such childish things, and the sooner I learned to hold in, the better off everybody would be. I soon forgot.
Cecil Jacobs made me forget. He had announced in the school-yard the day before that Scout Finch's daddy defended niggers. I denied it, but told Jem.
âWhatâd he mean sayinâ that?â I asked.
âNothing,â Jem said. âAsk Atticus, heâll tell you.â
âDo you defend niggers, Atticus?â I asked him that evening.
âOf course I do. Donât say nigger. Scout. Thatâs common.â
â âs what everybody at school says.â
âFrom now on itâll be everybody less oneââ
âWell if you donât want me to grow up talkinâ that way, why do you send me to school?â
My father looked at me mildly, amusement in his eyes. Despite our compromise, my campaign to avoid school had continued in one form or another since my first dayâs dose of it; the beginning of last September had brought on sinking spells, dizziness, and mild gastric complaints. I went so far as to pay a nickel for the privilege of rubbing my head against the head of Miss Rachelâs cookâs son, who was afflicted with a tremendous ringworm. It didnât take.
But I was worrying another bone. âDo all lawyers defend n-Negroes, Atticus ?â
âOf course they do, Scout.â
âThen why did Cecil say you defended niggers? He made it sound like you were runninâ a still.â
Atticus sighed. âIâm simply defending a Negro â his nameâs Tom Robinson. He lives in that little settlement beyond the town dump. Heâs a member of Calpurniaâs church, and Cal knows his family well. She says theyâre clean-living folks. Scout, you arenât old enough to understand some things yet, but thereâs been some high talk around town to the effect that I shouldnât do much about defending this man. Itâs a peculiar case â it wonât come to trial until summer session. John Taylor was kind enough to give us a postponementâŠâ
âIf you shouldnât be defendinâ him, then why are you doinâ it?â
âFor a number of reasons,â said Atticus. âThe main one is, if I didnât I couldnât hold up my head in town, I couldnât represent this county in the legislature, I couldnât even tell you or Jem not to do something again.â
âYou mean if you didnât defend that man, Jem and me wouldnât have to mind you any more?â
âThatâs about right.â
âWhy?â
âBecause I could never ask you to mind me again. Scout, simply by the nature of the work, every lawyer gets at least one case in his lifetime that affects him personally. This oneâs mine, I guess. You might hear some ugly talk about it at school, but do one thing for me if you will: you just hold your head high and keep those fists down. No matter what anybody says to you, donât you let âem get your goat. Try fighting with your head for a change ⊠itâs a good one, even if it does resist learning.â
âAtticus, are we going to win it?â
âNo, honey.â
âThen whyââ
âSimply because we were licked a hundred years before we started is no reason for us not to try to win,â Atticus said.
âYou sound like Cousin Ike Finch,â I said. Cousin Ike Finch was Maycomb Countyâs sole surviving Confederate veteran. He wore a General Hood type beard of which he was inordinately vain. At least once a year Atticus, Jem and I called on him, and I would have to kiss him. It was horrible. Jem and I would listen respectfully to Atticus and Cousin Ike rehash the war. âTell you, Atticus,â Cousin Ike would say, âthe Missouri Compromise was what licked us, but if I had to go through it agin Iâd walk every step of the way there anâ every step back jist like I did before anâ furthermore weâd whip âem this time ⊠now in 1864, when Stonewall Jackson came around by -1 beg your pardon, young folks. 01â Blue Light was in heaven then. God rest his saintly brow. âŠâ
âCome here. Scout,â said Atticus. I crawled into his lap and tucked my head under his chin. He put his arms around me and rocked me gently. âItâs different this time,â he said. âThis time we arenât fighting the Yankees, weâre fighting our friends. But remember this, no matter how bitter things get, theyâre still our friends and this is still our home.â
With this in mind, I faced Cecil Jacobs in the schoolyard next day: âYou gonna take that back, boy?â
âYou gotta make me first!â he yelled. âMy folks said your daddy was a disgrace anâ that nigger oughta hang from the water-tank!â
I drew a bead on him, remembered what Atticus had said, then dropped my fists and walked away, âScoutâs a cow â ward!â ringing in my ears. It was the first time I ever walked away from a fight.
Somehow, if I fought Cecil I would let Atticus down. Atticus so rarely asked Jem and me to do something for him, I could take being called a coward for him. I felt extremely noble for having remembered, and remained noble for three weeks. Then Christmas came and disaster struck.
Jem and I viewed Christmas with mixed feelings. The good side was the tree and Uncle Jack Finch. Every Christmas Eve day we met Uncle Jack at Maycomb Junction, and he would spend a week with us.
A flip of the coin revealed the uncompromising lineaments of Aunt Alexandra and Francis.
I suppose I should include Uncle Jimmy, Aunt Alexandraâs husband, but as he never spoke a word to me in my life except to say,
No amount of sighing could induce Atticus to let us spend Christmas day at home. We went to Finchâs Landing every Christmas in my memory. The fact that Aunty was a good cook was some compensation for being forced to spend a religious holiday with Francis Hancock. He was a year older than I, and I avoided him on principle; he enjoyed everything I disapproved of, and disliked my ingenuous diversions.
Aunt Alexandra was Atticusâs sister, but when Jem told me about changelings and siblings, I decided that she had been swapped at birth, that my grandparents had perhaps received a Crawford instead of a Finch. Had I ever harboured the mystical motions about mountains that seem to obsess lawyers and judges, Aunt Alexandra would have been analogous to Mount Everest; throughout my early life, she was cold and there.
When Uncle Jack jumped down from the train Christmas Eve day, we had to wait for the porter to hand him two long packages. Jem and I always thought it funny when Uncle Jack pecked Atticus on the cheek; they were the only two men we ever saw kiss each other. Uncle Jack shook hands with Jem and swung me high, but not high enough; Uncle Jack was a head shorter than Atticus; the baby of the family, he was younger than Aunt Alexandra. He and Aunty looked alike, but Uncle Jack made better use of his face; we were never wary of his sharp nose and chin.
He was one of the few men of science who never terrified me, probably because he never behaved like a doctor. Whenever he performed a minor service for Jem and me, as removing a splinter from a foot, he would tell us exactly what he was going to do, give us an estimation of how much it would hurt, and explain the use of any tongs he employed. One Christmas I lurked in corners nursing a twisted splinter in my foot, permitting no one to come near me. When Uncle Jack caught me, he kept me laughing about a preacher who hated going to church so much that every day he stood at his gate in his dressing-gown, smoking a hookah and delivering five-minute sermons to any passers-by who desired spiritual comfort. I interrupted to make Uncle Jack let me know when he would pull it out, but he held up a bloody splinter in a pair of tweezers and said he yanked it while I was laughing, that was what was known as relativity.
âWhatâs in those packages?â I asked him, pointing to the long thin parcels the porter had given him.
âNone of your business,â he said.
Jem said, âHowâs Rose Aylmer?â
Rose Aylmer was Uncle Jackâs cat. She was a beautiful yellow female. Uncle Jack said she was one of the few women he could stand permanently. He reached into his coat pocket and brought out some snapshots. We admired them.
âSheâs gettinâ fat,â I said.
âI should think so. She eats all the left-over fingers and ears from the hospital.â
âAw, thatâs a damn story,â I said.
âI beg your pardon?â
Atticus said, âDonât pay any attention to her, Jack. Sheâs trying you out. Cal says sheâs been cussing fluently for a week, now.â
Uncle Jack raised his eyebrows and said nothing. I was proceeding on the dim theory, aside from the innate attractiveness of such words, that if Atticus discovered I had picked them up at school he wouldnât make me go.
But at supper that evening when I asked him to pass the damn ham, please. Uncle Jack pointed at me. âSee me afterwards, young lady,â he said.
When supper was over, Uncle Jack went to the living-room and sat down. He slapped his thighs for me to come sit on his lap. I liked to smell him; he was like a bottle of alcohol and something pleasantly sweet. He pushed back my bangs, and looked at me. âYouâre more like Atticus than your mother,â he said. âYouâre also growing out of your pants a little.â
âI reckon they fit all right.â
âYou like words like damn and hell now, donât you?â
I said I reckoned so.
âWell I donât,â said Uncle Jack, ânot unless thereâs extreme provocation connected with âcm. Iâll be here a week, and I donât want to hear any words like that while Iâm here. Scout, youâll get In trouble if you go around saying things like that. You want to ^row up to be a lady, donât you ?â
I said not particularly.
âOf course you do. Now letâs get to the tree.â
We decorated the tree until bedtime, and that night I dreamed of the two long packages for Jem and me. Next morning Jem and I dived for them; they were from Atticus, who had written Uncle Jack to get them for us, and they were what we had asked for.
âDonât point them in the house,â said Atticus, when Jem aimed at a picture on the wall.
âYouâll have to teach âem to shoot,â said Uncle Jack.
âThatâs your job,â said Atticus. âI merely bowed to the inevitable.â
It took Atticusâs courtroom voice to drag us away from the tree. He declined to let us take our air-rifles to the Landing (I had already begun to think of shooting Francis) and said if we made one false move heâd take them away from us for good.
Finches Landing consisted of three hundred and sixty-six steps down a high bluff and ending in a jetty. Farther down stream, beyond the bluff, were traces of an old cotton landing, where Finch Negroes had loaded bales and produce, unloaded blocks of ice, flour and sugar, farm equipment, and feminine apparel. A two-rut road ran from the riverside and vanished among dark trees. At the end of the road was a two-storeyed white house with porches circling it upstairs and downstairs. In his old age, our ancestor Simon Finch had built it to please his nagging wife; but with the porches all resemblance to ordinary houses of its era ended. The internal arrangements of the Finch house were indicative of Simonâs guilelessness and the absolute trust with which he regarded his offspring.
There were six bedrooms upstairs, four for the eight female children, one for Welcome Finch, the sole son, and one for visiting relatives. Simple enough; but the daughtersâ rooms could be reached only by one staircase, Welcomeâs room and the guest- room only by another. The Daughtersâ Staircase was in the ground-floor bedroom of their parents, so Simon always knew the hours of his daughtersâ nocturnal comings and goings.
There was a kitchen separate from the rest of the house, tacked on to it by a wooden catwalk; in the back yard was a rusty bell on a pole, used to summon field hands or as a distress signal; a widowâs walk was on the roof, but no widows walked there - from it, Simon oversaw his overseer, watched the river-boats, and gazed into the lives of surrounding landholders.
There went with the house the usual legend about the Yankees: one Finch female, recently engaged, donned her complete trousseau to save it from raiders in the neighbourhood; she became stuck in the door to the Daughtersâ Staircase but was doused with water and finally pushed through. When we arrived at the Landing, Aunt Alexandra kissed Uncle Jack, Francis kissed Uncle Jack, Uncle Jimmy shook hands silently with Uncle Jack, Jem and I gave our presents to Francis, who gave us a present. Jem felt his age and gravitated to the adults, leaving me to entertain our cousin. Francis was eight and slicked back his hair.
âWhatâd you get for Christmas?â I asked politely.
âJust what I asked for,â he said. Francis had requested a pair of knee-pants, a red leather booksack, five shirts and an untied bow-tie.
âThatâs nice,â I lied. âJem and me got air-rifles, and Jem got a chemistry setââ
âA toy one, I reckon.â
âNo, a real one. Heâs gonna make me some invisible ink, and Iâm gonna write to Dill in it.â
Francis asked what was the use of that.
âWell, canât you just see his face when he gets a letter from me with nothing in it? Itâll drive him nuts.â
Talking to Francis gave me the sensation of settling slowly to the bottom of the ocean. He was the most boring child I ever met. As he lived in Mobile, he could not inform on me to school authorities, but he managed to tell everything he knew to Aunt Alexandra, who in turn unburdened herself to Atticus, who either forgot it or gave me hell, whichever struck his fancy. But the only time I ever heard Atticus speak sharply to anyone was when I once heard him say, âSister, I do the best I can with them!â It had something to do with my going around in overalls.
Aunt Alexandra was fanatical on the subject of my attire. 1 could not possibly hope to be a lady if I wore breeches; when 1 said I could do nothing in a dress, she said I wasnât supposed to be doing things that required pants. Aunt Alexandraâs vision of my deportment involved playing with small stoves, tea-sets, and wearing the Add-A-Pearl necklace she gave me when I was born; furthermore, I should be a ray of sunshine in my fatherâs lonely life. I suggested that one could be a ray of sunshine in pants just as well, but Aunty said that one had to behave like a sunbeam, that I was born good but had grown progressively worse every year. She hurt my feelings and set my teeth permanently on edge, but when I asked Atticus about it, he said there were already enough sunbeams in the family and to go on about my business, he didnât mind me much the way I was.
At Christmas dinner, I sat at the little table in the dining- room; Jem and Francis sat with the adults at the dining table. Aunty had continued to isolate me long after Jem and Francis graduated to the big table. I often wondered what she thought Iâd do, get up and throw something? I sometimes thought of asking her if she would let me sit at the big table with the rest of them just once, I would prove to her how civilized I could be; after all, I ate at home every day with no major mishaps. When I begged Atticus to use his influence, he said he had none - we were guests, and we sat where she told us to sit. He also said Aunt Alexandra didnât understand girls much, sheâd never had one.
But her cooking made up for everything: three kinds of meat, summer vegetables from her pantry shelves; peach pickles, two kinds of cake and ambrosia constituted a modest Christmas dinner. Afterwards, the adults made for the living-room and sat around in a dazed condition. Jem lay on the floor, and I went to the back yard. âPut on your coat,â said Atticus dreamily, so I didnât hear him.
Francis sat beside me on the back steps. âThat was the best yet,â I said.
âGrandmaâs a wonderful cook,â said Frauds. âSheâs gonna teach me how.â
âBoys donât cook.â I giggled at the thought of Jem in an apron.
âGrandma says all men should learn to cook, that men oughta be careful with their wives and wait on âem when they donât feel good,â said my cousin.
âI donât want Dill waitinâ on me,â I said. âIâd rather wait on him.â
âDill?â
âYeah. Donât say anything about it yet, but weâre gonna get married as soon as weâre big enough. He asked me last summer.â
Francis hooted.
âWhatâs the matter with him?â I asked. âAinât anything the matter with him.â
âYou mean that little runt Grandma says stays with Miss Rachel every summer?â
âThatâs exactly who I mean.â
âI know all about him,â said Francis.
âWhat about him?â
âGrandma says he hasnât got a homeââ
âHas too, he lives in Meridian.â
ââhe just gets passed around from relative to relative, and Miss Rachel keeps him every summer.â
âFrancis, thatâs not so!â
Francis grinned at me. âYouâre mighty dumb sometimes, Jean Louise. Guess you donât know any better, though.â
âWhat do you mean?â
âIf Uncle Atticus lets you run around with stray dogs, thatâs his own business, like Grandma says, so it ainât your fault. I guess it ainât your fault if Uncle Atticus is a nigger-lover besides, but Iâm here to tell you it certainly does mortify the rest of the familyââ
âFrauds, what the hell do you mean?â
âJust what I said. Grandma says itâs bad enough he lets you all run wild, but now heâs turned out a nigger-lover weâll never be able to walk the streets of Maycomb agin. Heâs ruininâ the family, thatâs what heâs doinâ.â
Francis rose and sprinted down the catwalk to the old kitchen. At a safe distance he called, âHeâs nothinâ but a nigger-lover!â
âHe is not!â I roared. âI donât know what youâre talkinâ about, but you better cut it out this red-hot minute!â
I leaped off the steps and ran down the catwalk. It was easy to collar Francis. I said take it back quick.
Francis jerked loose and sped into the old kitchen. âNigger- lover!â he yelled.
When stalking oneâs prey, it is best to take oneâs time. Say nothing, and as sure as eggs he will become curious and emerge. Francis appeared at the kitchen door. âYou still mad, Jean Louise?â he asked tentatively.
âNothing to speak of,â I said.
Francis came out on the catwalk.
âYou gonna take it back, Fra â ancis?â But I was too quick on the draw. Francis shot back into the kitchen, so I retired to the steps. I could wait patiently. I had sat there perhaps five minutes when I heard Aunt Alexandra speak: âWhereâs Francis?â
âHeâs out yonder in the kitchen.â
âHe knows heâs not supposed to play in there.â
Francis came to the door and yelled, âGrandma, sheâs got me in here and she wonât let me out!â
âWhat is all this, Jean Louise?â
I looked up at Aunt Alexandra. âI havenât got him in there, Aunty, I ainât holdinâ him.â
âYes she is,â shouted Francis, âshe wonât let me out!â
âHave you all been fussing?â
âJean Louise got mad at me, Grandma,â called Francis.
âFrancis, come out of there! Jean Louise, if I hear another word out of you Iâll tell your father. Did I hear you say hell a while ago?â
âNome.â
âI thought I did. Iâd better not hear it again.â
Aunt Alexandra was a back-porch listener. The moment she was out of sight Francis came out head up and grinning. âDonât you fool with me,â he said.
He jumped into the yard and kept his distance, kicking tufts of grass, turning around occasionally to smile at me. Jem appeared on the porch, looked at us, and went away. Francis climbed the mimosa tree, came down, put his hands in his pockets and strolled around the yard. âHah!â he said. I asked him who he thought he was, Uncle Jack? Francis said he reckoned I got told, for me to just sit there and leave him alone.
âI ainât botherinâ you,â I said.
Francis looked at me carefully, concluded that I had been sufficiently subdued, and crooned softly, âNigger-loverâŠâ
This time, I split my knuckle to the bone on his front teeth. My left impaired, I sailed in with my right, but not for long. Uncle Jack pinned my arms to my sides and said, âStand still!â
Aunt Alexandra ministered to Francis, wiping his tears away with her handkerchief, rubbing his hair, patting his cheek. Atticus, Jem, and Uncle Jimmy had come to the back porch when Francis started yelling.
âWho started this?â said Uncle Jack.
Francis and I pointed at each other. âGrandma,â he bawled, âshe called me a whore-lady and jumped on me!â
âIs that true. Scout?â said Uncle Jack.
âI reckon so.â
When Uncle Jack looked down at me, his features were like Aunt Alexandraâs. âYou know I told you youâd get in trouble if you used words like that? I told you, didnât I?â
âYes sir, butââ
âWell, youâre in trouble now. Stay there.â
I was debating whether to stand there or run, and tarried in indecision a moment too long; I turned to flee but Uncle Jack was quicker. I found myself suddenly looking at a tiny ant struggling with a bread-crumb in the grass.
âIâll never speak to you again as long as I live! I hate you anâ despise you anâ hope you die tomorrow!â A statement that seemed to encourage Uncle Jack, more than anything. I ran to Atticus for comfort, but he said I had it coming and it was high time we went home. I climbed into the back seat of the car without saying good-bye to anyone, and at home I ran to my room and slammed the door. Jem tried to say something nice, but I wouldnât let him.
When I surveyed the damage there were only seven or eight red marks, and I was reflecting upon relativity when someone knocked on the door. I asked who it was; Uncle Jack answered.
âGo away!â
Uncle Jack said if I talked like that heâd lick me again, so I was quiet. When he entered the room I retreated to a corner and turned my back on him. âScout,â he said, âdo you still hate me?â
âGo on, please sir.â
âWhy, I didnât think youâd hold it against me,â he said. âIâm disappointed in you - you had that coming and you know it.â
âDidnât either.â
âHoney, you canât go around calling peopleââ
âYou ainât fair,â I said, âyou ainât fair.â
Uncle Jackâs eyebrows went up. âNot fair? How not?â
âYouâre real nice, Uncle Jack, anâ I reckon I love you even after what you did, but you donât understand children much.â
Uncle Jack put his hands on his hips and looked down at me. âAnd why do I not understand children. Miss Jean Louise? Such conduct as yours required little understanding. It was obstreperous, disorderly, and abusiveââ
âYou gonna give me a chance to tell you? I donât mean to sass you, Iâm just tryinâ to tell you.â
Uncle Jack sat down on the bed. His eyebrows came together, and he peered up at me from under them. âProceed,â he said.
I took a deep breath. âWell, in the first place you never stopped to gimme a chance to tell you my side of it â you just lit right into me. When Jem anâ I fuss Atticus doesnât ever just listen to Jemâs side of it, he hears mine too, anâ in the second place you told me never to use words like that except in ex-extreme provocation, and Francis provocated me enough to knock his block offââ
Uncle Jack scratched his head. âWhat was your side of it, Scout?â
âFrancis called Atticus something anâ I wasnât about to take it off him.â
âWhat did Francis call him?â
âA nigger-lover. I ainât very sure what it means, but the way Francis said it â tell you one thing right now, Uncle Jack, Iâll be â I swear before God if Iâll sit there and let him say somethinâ about Atticus.â
âHe called Atticus that?â
âYes sir, he did, anâ a lot more. Said Atticusâd be the ruination of the family anâ he let Jem anâ me run wildâŠâ
From the look on Uncle Jackâs face, I thought I was in for it again. When he said, âWeâll see about this,â I knew Francis was in for it. âIâve a good mind to go out there tonight.â
âPlease sir, just let it go. Please.â
âIâve no intention of letting it go,â he said. âAlexandra should know about this. The idea of â waitâll I get my hands on that boy âŠâ
âUncle Jack, please promise me somethinâ, please sir. Promise you wonât tell Atticus about this. He â he asked me one time not to let anything I heard about him make me mad, anâ Iâd ruther him think we were fightinâ about somethinâ else instead. Please promiseâŠâ
âBut I donât like Francis getting away with something like thatââ
âHe didnât. You reckon you could tie up my hand? Itâs still bleedinâ some.â
âOf course I will, baby. I know of no hand I would be more delighted to tie up. Will you come this way?â
Uncle Jack gallantly showed me to the bathroom. While he cleaned and bandaged my knuckles, he entertained me with a tale about a funny near-sighted old gentleman who had a cat named Hodge, and who counted all the cracks in the sidewalk when he went to town. âThere now,â he said. âYouâll have a very unladylike scar on your wedding-ring finger.â
âThank you sir. Uncle Jack?â
âMaâam?â
âWhatâs a whore-lady?â
Uncle Jack plunged into another long tale about an old Prime Minister who sat in the House of Commons and blew feathers in the air and tried to keep them there when all about him men were losing their heads. I guess he was trying to answer my question, but he made no sense whatsoever.
Later, when I was supposed to be in bed, I went down the hall for a drink of water and heard Atticus and Uncle Jack in the living-room:
âI shall never marry, Atticus.â
âWhy?â
âI might have children.â
Atticus said, âYouâve a lot to learn. Jack.â
âI know. Your daughter gave me my first lesson this afternoon. She said I didnât understand children much and told me why. She was quite right. Atticus, she told me how I should have treated her â oh dear, Iâm so sorry I romped on her.â
Atticus chuckled. âShe earned it, so donât feel too remorseful.â
I waited, on tenterhooks, for Uncle Jack to tell Atticus my side of it. But he didnât. He simply murmured, âHer use of bathroom invective leaves nothing to the imagination. But she doesnât know the meaning of half she says - she asked me what a whore- lady was âŠâ
âDid you tell her?â
âNo, I told her about Lord Melbourne.â
âJack! When a child asks you something, answer him, for goodnessâ sake. But donât make a production of it. Children are children, but they can spot an evasion quicker than adults, and evasion simply muddles âem. No,â my father mused, âyou had the right answer this afternoon, but the wrong reasons. Bad language is a stage all children go through, and it dies with time when they learn theyâre not attracting attention with it. Hot-headedness isnât. Scoutâs got to learn to keep her head and learn soon, with whatâs in store for her these next few months. Sheâs coming along, though. Jemâs getting older and she follows his example a good bit now. All she needs is assistance sometimes.â
âAtticus, youâve never laid a hand on her.â
âI admit that. So far Iâve been able to get by with threats. Jack, she minds me as well as she can. Doesnât come up to scratch half the time, but she tries.â
âThatâs not the answer,â said Uncle Jack.
âNo, the answer is she knows I know she tries. Thatâs what makes the difference. What bothers me is that she and Jem will have to absorb some ugly things pretty soon. Iâm not worried about Jem keeping his head, but Scoutâd just as soon jump on someone as look at him if her prideâs at stake. âŠâ
I waited for Uncle Jack to break his promise. He still didnât.
âAtticus, how bad is this going to be? You havenât had too much chance to discuss it.â
âIt couldnât be worse. Jack. The only thing weâve got is a black manâs word against the Ewellsâ. The evidence boils down to you-did â I-didnât. The Jury couldnât possibly be expected to take Tom Robinsonâs word against the Ewellsâ â are you acquainted with the Ewells?â
Uncle Jack said yes, he remembered them. He described them to Atticus, but Atticus said, âYouâre a generation off. The present ones are the same, though.â
âWhat are you going to do, then?â
âBefore Iâm through, I intend to jar the jury a bit â I think weâll have a reasonable chance on appeal, though. I really canât tell at this stage, Jack. You know, Iâd hoped to get through life without a case of this kind, but John Taylor pointed at me and said, âYouâre It.â â
âLet this cup pass from you, eh?â
âRight. But do you think I could face my children otherwise? You know whatâs going to happen as well as I do, Jack, and I hope and pray I can get Jem and Scout through it without bitterness, and most of all, without catching Maycombâs usual disease. Why reasonable people go stark raving mad when anything involving a Negro comes up, is something I donât pretend to understand ... I just hope that Jem and Scout come to me for their answers instead of listening to the town. I hope they trust me enough. ... Jean Louise?â
My scalp jumped. I stuck my head around the corner. âSir?â
âGo to bed.â
I scurried to my room and went to bed. Uncle Jack was a prince of a fellow not to let me down. But I never figured out how Atticus knew I was listening, and it was not until many years later that I realized he wanted me to hear every word he said.