Chapter 5
My nagging got the better of Jem eventually, as I knew it would, and to my relief
we slowed down the game for a while. He still maintained, however, that Atticus
hadnât said we couldnât, therefore we could; and if Atticus ever said we couldnât,
Jem had thought of a way around it: he would simply change the names of the
characters and then we couldnât be accused of playing anything.
Dill was in hearty agreement with this plan of action. Dill was becoming
something of a trial anyway, following Jem about. He had asked me earlier in the
summer to marry him, then he promptly forgot about it. He staked me out, marked
as his property, said I was the only girl he would ever love, then he neglected me.
I beat him up twice but it did no good, he only grew closer to Jem. They spent
days together in the treehouse plotting and planning, calling me only when they
needed a third party. But I kept aloof from their more foolhardy schemes for a
while, and on pain of being called a girl, I spent most of the remaining twilights
that summer sitting with Miss Maudie Atkinson on her front porch.
Jem and I had always enjoyed the free run of Miss Maudieâs yard if we kept out
of her azaleas, but our contact with her was not clearly defined. Until Jem and
Dill excluded me from their plans, she was only another lady in the neighborhood,
but a relatively benign presence.
Our tacit treaty with Miss Maudie was that we could play on her lawn, eat her
scuppernongs if we didnât jump on the arbor, and explore her vast back lot, terms
so generous we seldom spoke to her, so careful were we to preserve the delicate
balance of our relationship, but Jem and Dill drove me closer to her with their
behavior.
Miss Maudie hated her house: time spent indoors was time wasted. She was a
widow, a chameleon lady who worked in her flower beds in an old straw hat and
menâs coveralls, but after her five oâclock bath she would appear on the porch and
reign over the street in magisterial beauty.
She loved everything that grew in Godâs earth, even the weeds. With one
exception. If she found a blade of nut grass in her yard it was like the Second
Battle of the Marne: she swooped down upon it with a tin tub and subjected it to
blasts from beneath with a poisonous substance she said was so powerful itâd kill
us all if we didnât stand out of the way.
âWhy canât you just pull it up?â I asked, after witnessing a prolonged campaign
against a blade not three inches high.
âPull it up, child, pull it up?â She picked up the limp sprout and squeezed her
thumb up its tiny stalk. Microscopic grains oozed out. âWhy, one sprig of nut
grass can ruin a whole yard. Look here. When it comes fall this dries up and the
wind blows it all over Maycomb County!â Miss Maudieâs face likened such an
occurrence unto an Old Testament pestilence.
Her speech was crisp for a Maycomb County inhabitant. She called us by all our
names, and when she grinned she revealed two minute gold prongs clipped to her
eyeteeth. When I admired them and hoped I would have some eventually, she
said, âLook here.â With a click of her tongue she thrust out her bridgework, a
gesture of cordiality that cemented our friendship.
Miss Maudieâs benevolence extended to Jem and Dill, whenever they paused in
their pursuits: we reaped the benefits of a talent Miss Maudie had hitherto kept
hidden from us. She made the best cakes in the neighborhood. When she was
admitted into our confidence, every time she baked she made a big cake and three
little ones, and she would call across the street: âJem Finch, Scout Finch, Charles
Baker Harris, come here!â Our promptness was always rewarded.
In summertime, twilights are long and peaceful. Often as not, Miss Maudie and I
would sit silently on her porch, watching the sky go from yellow to pink as the
sun went down, watching flights of martins sweep low over the neighborhood and
disappear behind the schoolhouse rooftops.
âMiss Maudie,â I said one evening, âdo you think Boo Radleyâs still alive?â
âHis nameâs Arthur and heâs alive,â she said. She was rocking slowly in her big
oak chair. âDo you smell my mimosa? Itâs like angelsâ breath this evening.â
âYessum. How do you know?â
âKnow what, child?â
âThat BâMr. Arthurâs still alive?â
âWhat a morbid question. But I suppose itâs a morbid subject. I know heâs alive,
Jean Louise, because I havenât seen him carried out yet.â
âMaybe he died and they stuffed him up the chimney.â
âWhere did you get such a notion?â
âThatâs what Jem said he thought they did.â
âS-ss-ss. He gets more like Jack Finch every day.â
Miss Maudie had known Uncle Jack Finch, Atticusâs brother, since they were
children. Nearly the same age, they had grown up together at Finchâs Landing.
Miss Maudie was the daughter of a neighboring landowner, Dr. Frank Buford. Dr.
Bufordâs profession was medicine and his obsession was anything that grew in
the ground, so he stayed poor. Uncle Jack Finch confined his passion for digging
to his window boxes in Nashville and stayed rich. We saw Uncle Jack every
Christmas, and every Christmas he yelled across the street for Miss Maudie to
come marry him. Miss Maudie would yell back, âCall a little louder, Jack Finch,
and theyâll hear you at the post office, I havenât heard you yet!â Jem and I thought
this a strange way to ask for a ladyâs hand in marriage, but then Uncle Jack was
rather strange. He said he was trying to get Miss Maudieâs goat, that he had been
trying unsuccessfully for forty years, that he was the last person in the world Miss
Maudie would think about marrying but the first person she thought about teasing,
and the best defense to her was spirited offense, all of which we understood
clearly.
âArthur Radley just stays in the house, thatâs all,â said Miss Maudie. âWouldnât
you stay in the house if you didnât want to come out?â
âYessum, but Iâd wanta come out. Why doesnât he?â
Miss Maudieâs eyes narrowed. âYou know that story as well as I do.â
âI never heard why, though. Nobody ever told me why.â
Miss Maudie settled her bridgework. âYou know old Mr. Radley was a footwashing
Baptist-â
âThatâs what you are, ainât it?â
âMy shellâs not that hard, child. Iâm just a Baptist.â
âDonât you all believe in foot-washing?â
âWe do. At home in the bathtub.â
âBut we canât have communion with you all-â
Apparently deciding that it was easier to define primitive baptistry than closed
communion, Miss Maudie said: âFoot-washers believe anything thatâs pleasure is
a sin. Did you know some of âem came out of the woods one Saturday and passed
by this place and told me me and my flowers were going to hell?â
âYour flowers, too?â
âYes maâam. Theyâd burn right with me. They thought I spent too much time in
Godâs outdoors and not enough time inside the house reading the Bible.â
My confidence in pulpit Gospel lessened at the vision of Miss Maudie stewing
forever in various Protestant hells. True enough, she had an acid tongue in her
head, and she did not go about the neighborhood doing good, as did Miss
Stephanie Crawford. But while no one with a grain of sense trusted Miss
Stephanie, Jem and I had considerable faith in Miss Maudie. She had never told
on us, had never played cat-and-mouse with us, she was not at all interested in our
private lives. She was our friend. How so reasonable a creature could live in peril
of everlasting torment was incomprehensible.
âThat ainât right, Miss Maudie. Youâre the best lady I know.â
Miss Maudie grinned. âThank you maâam. Thing is, foot-washers think women
are a sin by definition. They take the Bible literally, you know.â
âIs that why Mr. Arthur stays in the house, to keep away from women?â
âIâve no idea.â
âIt doesnât make sense to me. Looks like if Mr. Arthur was hankerinâ after heaven
heâd come out on the porch at least. Atticus says Godâs loving folks like you love
yourself-â
Miss Maudie stopped rocking, and her voice hardened. âYou are too young to
understand it,â she said, âbut sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse
than a whiskey bottle in the hand ofâoh, of your father.â
I was shocked. âAtticus doesnât drink whiskey,â I said. âHe never drunk a drop in
his lifeânome, yes he did. He said he drank some one time and didnât like it.â
Miss Maudie laughed. âWasnât talking about your father,â she said. âWhat I
meant was, if Atticus Finch drank until he was drunk he wouldnât be as hard as
some men are at their best. There are just some kind of men whoâwhoâre so
busy worrying about the next world theyâve never learned to live in this one, and
you can look down the street and see the results.â
âDo you think theyâre true, all those things they say about BâMr. Arthur?â
âWhat things?â
I told her.
âThat is three-fourths colored folks and one-fourth Stephanie Crawford,â said
Miss Maudie grimly. âStephanie Crawford even told me once she woke up in the
middle of the night and found him looking in the window at her. I said what did
you do, Stephanie, move over in the bed and make room for him? That shut her
up a while.â
I was sure it did. Miss Maudieâs voice was enough to shut anybody up.
âNo, child,â she said, âthat is a sad house. I remember Arthur Radley when he
was a boy. He always spoke nicely to me, no matter what folks said he did. Spoke
as nicely as he knew how.â
âYou reckon heâs crazy?â
Miss Maudie shook her head. âIf heâs not he should be by now. The things that
happen to people we never really know. What happens in houses behind closed
doors, what secrets-â
âAtticus donât ever do anything to Jem and me in the house that he donât do in the
yard,â I said, feeling it my duty to defend my parent.
âGracious child, I was raveling a thread, wasnât even thinking about your father,
but now that I am Iâll say this: Atticus Finch is the same in his house as he is on
the public streets. Howâd you like some fresh poundcake to take home?â
I liked it very much.
Next morning when I awakened I found Jem and Dill in the back yard deep in
conversation. When I joined them, as usual they said go away.
âWill not. This yardâs as much mine as it is yours, Jem Finch. I got just as much
right to play in it as you have.â
Dill and Jem emerged from a brief huddle: âIf you stay youâve got to do what we
tell you,â Dill warned.
âWe-ll,â I said, âwhoâs so high and mighty all of a sudden?â
âIf you donât say youâll do what we tell you, we ainât gonna tell you anything,â
Dill continued.
âYou act like you grew ten inches in the night! All right, what is it?â
Jem said placidly, âWe are going to give a note to Boo Radley.â
âJust how?â I was trying to fight down the automatic terror rising in me. It was all
right for Miss Maudie to talkâshe was old and snug on her porch. It was
different for us.
Jem was merely going to put the note on the end of a fishing pole and stick it
through the shutters. If anyone came along, Dill would ring the bell.
Dill raised his right hand. In it was my motherâs silver dinner-bell.
âIâm goinâ around to the side of the house,â said Jem. âWe looked yesterday from
across the street, and thereâs a shutter loose. Think maybe I can make it stick on
the window sill, at least.â
âJem-â
âNow youâre in it and you canât get out of it, youâll just stay in it, Miss Priss!â
âOkay, okay, but I donât wanta watch. Jem, somebody was-â
âYes you will, youâll watch the back end of the lot and Dillâs gonna watch the
front of the house anâ up the street, anâ if anybody comes heâll ring the bell. That
clear?â
âAll right then. Whatâd you write him?â
Dill said, âWeâre askinâ him real politely to come out sometimes, and tell us what
he does in thereâwe said we wouldnât hurt him and weâd buy him an ice cream.â
âYou allâve gone crazy, heâll kill us!â
Dill said, âItâs my idea. I figure if heâd come out and sit a spell with us he might
feel better.â
âHow do you know he donât feel good?â
âWell howâd you feel if youâd been shut up for a hundred years with nothinâ but
cats to eat? I bet heâs got a beard down to here-â âLike your daddyâs?â
âHe ainât got a beard, he-â Dill stopped, as if trying to remember.
âUh huh, caughtcha,â I said. âYou said âfore you were off the train good your
daddy had a black beard-â
âIf itâs all the same to you he shaved it off last summer! Yeah, anâ Iâve got the
letter to prove itâhe sent me two dollars, too!â
âKeep onâI reckon he even sent you a mounted police uniform! Thatân never
showed up, did it? You just keep on tellinâ âem, son-â
Dill Harris could tell the biggest ones I ever heard. Among other things, he had
been up in a mail plane seventeen times, he had been to Nova Scotia, he had seen
an elephant, and his granddaddy was Brigadier General Joe Wheeler and left him
his sword.
âYou all hush,â said Jem. He scuttled beneath the house and came out with a
yellow bamboo pole. âReckon this is long enough to reach from the sidewalk?â
âAnybody whoâs brave enough to go up and touch the house hadnât oughta use a
fishinâ pole,â I said. âWhy donât you just knock the front door down?â
âThisâisâdifferent,â said Jem, âhow many times do I have to tell you that?â
Dill took a piece of paper from his pocket and gave it to Jem. The three of us
walked cautiously toward the old house. Dill remained at the light-pole on the
front corner of the lot, and Jem and I edged down the sidewalk parallel to the side
of the house. I walked beyond Jem and stood where I could see around the curve.
âAll clear,â I said. âNot a soul in sight.â
Jem looked up the sidewalk to Dill, who nodded.
Jem attached the note to the end of the fishing pole, let the pole out across the
yard and pushed it toward the window he had selected. The pole lacked several
inches of being long enough, and Jem leaned over as far as he could. I watched
him making jabbing motions for so long, I abandoned my post and went to him.
âCanât get it off the pole,â he muttered, âor if I got it off I canât make it stay. Gâon
back down the street, Scout.â
I returned and gazed around the curve at the empty road. Occasionally I looked
back at Jem, who was patiently trying to place the note on the window sill. It
would flutter to the ground and Jem would jab it up, until I thought if Boo Radley
ever received it he wouldnât be able to read it. I was looking down the street when
the dinner-bell rang.
Shoulder up, I reeled around to face Boo Radley and his bloody fangs; instead, I
saw Dill ringing the bell with all his might in Atticusâs face.
Jem looked so awful I didnât have the heart to tell him I told him so. He trudged
along, dragging the pole behind him on the sidewalk.
Atticus said, âStop ringing that bell.â
Dill grabbed the clapper; in the silence that followed, I wished heâd start ringing it
again. Atticus pushed his hat to the back of his head and put his hands on his hips.
âJem,â he said, âwhat were you doing?â
âNothinâ, sir.â
âI donât want any of that. Tell me.â
âI wasâwe were just tryinâ to give somethinâ to Mr. Radley.â
âWhat were you trying to give him?â
âJust a letter.â
âLet me see it.â
Jem held out a filthy piece of paper. Atticus took it and tried to read it. âWhy do
you want Mr. Radley to come out?â
Dill said, âWe thought he might enjoy usâŠâ and dried up when Atticus looked at
him.
âSon,â he said to Jem, âIâm going to tell you something and tell you one time:
stop tormenting that man. That goes for the other two of you.â
What Mr. Radley did was his own business. If he wanted to come out, he would.
If he wanted to stay inside his own house he had the right to stay inside free from
the attentions of inquisitive children, which was a mild term for the likes of us.
How would we like it if Atticus barged in on us without knocking, when we were
in our rooms at night? We were, in effect, doing the same thing to Mr. Radley.
What Mr. Radley did might seem peculiar to us, but it did not seem peculiar to
him. Furthermore, had it never occurred to us that the civil way to communicate
with another being was by the front door instead of a side window? Lastly, we
were to stay away from that house until we were invited there, we were not to
play an asinine game he had seen us playing or make fun of anybody on this street
or in this town-
âWe werenât makinâ fun of him, we werenât laughinâ at him,â said Jem, âwe were
just-â
âSo that was what you were doing, wasnât it?â
âMakinâ fun of him?â
âNo,â said Atticus, âputting his lifeâs history on display for the edification of the
neighborhood.â
Jem seemed to swell a little. âI didnât say we were doinâ that, I didnât say it!â
Atticus grinned dryly. âYou just told me,â he said. âYou stop this nonsense right
now, every one of you.â
Jem gaped at him.
âYou want to be a lawyer, donât you?â Our fatherâs mouth was suspiciously firm,
as if he were trying to hold it in line.
Jem decided there was no point in quibbling, and was silent. When Atticus went
inside the house to retrieve a file he had forgotten to take to work that morning,
Jem finally realized that he had been done in by the oldest lawyerâs trick on
record. He waited a respectful distance from the front steps, watched Atticus
leave the house and walk toward town. When Atticus was out of earshot Jem
yelled after him: âI thought I wanted to be a lawyer but I ainât so sure now!â