Open Mike Eagle
Sounds Like Rap
[Verse 1: Psychosiz]
They say the sound makes the man
I say
Say again
I don’t copy that
I cut and paste
I’m ALT-Xing all of that
(Boi)
Holla back boy
Don’t be scurred
Just throw a little bit of this right thur
(Shawtie)
Behind yo’ ears
Yo’ neck
Yo’ back
Yo’ hands
Where your eyes can see me riding durty
Fuck the police
Like Chris Brown
Beat a bitch down
Uh... I heard Rhianna got herpes
DANGER!
Watch yourself
Don’t go chasing waterfalls
When it’s hotter broads in the sauna
All day
Guppies tryna’ swim with the big fish
Man I did this in my mom and dad’s garage on Garage Band
And I ain’t even mix it
You ain’t gotta’ mix it right
You just gotta’ remix it tight
Tada!
Uh… Tadow!
How do you like it now?
It needs something
A leather
A white tee
Ze feather
A wifebeat
A message from Spike Lee
A necklace that’s icy
…Better writing
If you can make it sound like
They need to be naked now right
Before they bring down the house lights
We can get laid
If you can make it sound like
A Jamaican style like
Booyaka, shoot’em up boi, who wan’ wat!
We can get weed
If you can make it sound like
An electric sound byte
Like 0_0133t0_-
We’re in the game
If you can make it sound like
Every other rapper I like
And avoid the copyrights then
We can get paid
[Verse 2: Open Mike Eagle]
You guys are so challenging
Dismount your high balance beam
So you can satisfy my album needs
And don’t go down into the sea
Like 5,000 Leagues
That’s far too deep
For my squeamish boundaries
Dumb and Mike had to be on drugs to write Alchemy
On dialysis or mescaline or SMACK IVs
And you guys are obviously not the Black Eyed Peas
So tell Open Mike Eagle it’s pretty annoying when he rhymes and sings
So I guess I shouldn’t then
I apologize
But I would have been more sensitive
Except that I’ve got this wooden skin
I couldn’t blend with the men with the bankrolls
Even with a Kangol
Surrounded by skanks pointing there stank holes
At a mini DV camera mounted atop a maypole
Scaly skin is one day older when taped in HD
I tried to make an escape
But I tangled my bathing ape strings
And sprained my ankle
Painful
And it was shameful
Me and hipster rap
At a perpendicular angle
If you can make it sound like
The fashion crowds wrapped around
Your plaid and brown matching shrouds
We can get clothes
If you can make it sound like
The gangsters is up here
N***a, fuck yo’ rhyme scheme
We can get hoes
If you can make it sound like
Every other rappin’ rapper out
With a rappity rap rapping style
We can get shows
If you can make it sound like
The same shit they dragging out
But a little more swaggered out
We can get dough
[Verse 3: Dumbfoundead]
I can make it sound like
Rap, jazz, blues, funk, classical, electro, dubstep or punk
What’s next to come
We’re one step above
Music you can bump
Making drunk sex for love
From the flat beds to rap heads
To the nerds with blackheads
Who have dreds
With that said
We can make it sound like rap
And underground and back
Got Califormula stored inside
White powdered packets
Give me a power jack and a mic
A Sour Patch and a Sprite
With DJ Zo on Pro Tools
Tracking me right
Love raps
Bud raps
Gun raps
Rap raps
Been there
Done that
To the OGs who want old raps to come back
To the young cats with one rap they run back
To the rugrats with the potential still untapped
Come rap
No don’t
This promo’s a Dumb track
Just go run laps and become an athlete
Or join a rapper’s entourage and take a backseat
Bitch!