[Intro -- Spoken]
Long ago, in a far away land... There lived a dashing rake of ill rebute. Everyone asked how he wooed the maidens... but nobody ever asked why! [Laughter]

[Verse 1]
Makin' my way through the club tonight
Two drinks in my hand, one thought on my mind
See a PYT by the E-N-Tree
She's gotta be the one to come home with me
He's the man out on attack
The ladies love him, that's a matter of fact
He brings a new one home each time
Who is gonna be his prize?

[Chorus]
Won't you please come over tonight?
'Cause there's some ghosts in my motherfuckin' household
Won't you please sleep by my side?
'Cause I don't wanna be alone in my home
Come with me, girl, don't be shy
This is why I bring a lady home each night
I don't even want to have sex
Just take me from these funky spirits!

[Verse 2]
Now we're at the crib and it's gettin' spooky
Lotsa ghosts, spooky, spooky
Wooden cross, salt circle, holy waters
Book o' spells, sage, someone's daughter
"If this place is haunted, why don't you leave?"
'Cause still I got a few months left on the lease
"Couldn't we have just gone back to my place?"
Aw, shit! Wait-- FUCK!
[Chorus]
Won't you please come over tonight?
There's some ghosts in my motherfuckin' household
Won't you please sleep by my side?
I don't wanna be alone in my home
Come with me, girl, don't be shy
This is why I bring a lady home each night
We could even try to have sex
But the ghosts just float and watch