Sometimes I get anxious
In my head I’m convinced I’m always being looked at
But I'm always looking myself too
It’s like I’m only ever sure in who I am when I’m on my own

I wish confidence was more consistent
I think a lot about what it must feel like to wake up everyday sure in ones self
Because my morning routine consists of me convincing myself I’m worth it

And I’m hardly convinced

It’s funny how uncomfortable we can feel inside the bodies we’ve known our entire lives
It’s unnatural to be ashamed of the way I was made to be

So I’ve been making an effort to face mirrors more often

Now I know enough to know I don’t have to try to be beautiful
Because i am
I’ve a got small ears & lazy eye
A broad forehead and crooked teeth
I didn’t have a say in how I was made I but I'm beginning to understand who I was made to be

So when I get anxious
When I’m convinced everyone is looking at me
I look at myself and smile
Knowing I am something worth looking at
Last Thursday February 21st
I felt, really anxious
I don't know what it's been for the last few days but it's just felt like confusion
There's a lot going on and there's a lot going wrong
[?] everything that's going wrong is inside my head
I feel like I keep spiraling down anxious

And I know it's irrational
Everything about anxiety is completely irrational
That's what makes it harder to talk to anyone about because
Most people, are gonna, are gonna want to give rational answers
Well
Why don't you just try being yourself
Why don't you just... text them back, and just see what happens
Like these are rational answers to an irrational problem
So they don't help at all they just make me feel even more irrational
Feel Me?
Fuck it I'm crazy or something