Hi! We’re the Wiggles! And welcome to our wiggly website!

I have no penis
I have no penis
I have no penis
I have no penis
I have no penis
I have no penis
I have no penis

Welcome! Welcome! welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
Welcome! Welcome!
Mail! Welcome! You’ve got mail!
Welcome!
You’ve you’ve you’ve you’ve you’ve got got got got got got got got mail mail mail mail mail mail
Welcome! You’ve got mail! Mail! You’ve got- Goodbye!

Hey buddy, if you’re a man looking for another man, then you’ve called the right place.
Because this is the cheapest gay phone service around.
We’re talking about a average market of only $2.99 to $4.99 per minute.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, and loot!
Drink up, me ‘earties, yo ho!
We kidnap and ravage and don’t give a hoot!
Drink up me ‘earties, yo ho!
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We extort, we pilfer, we filch, and sack!
Drink up, me ‘earties, yo ho!
Maraud and embezzle, and even high-jack!
Drink up, me ‘earties, yo ho

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We kindle and char, inflame and ignite!
Drink up, me ‘earties, yo ho!
Oh yo, seitrae’ em, pu knird!

Pika pika pi!

Welcome! Welcome! welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
Welcome! Welcome!
Mail! Welcome! You’ve got mail!
Welcome!
You’ve you’ve you’ve you’ve you’ve got got got got got got got got mail mail mail mail mail mail
Welcome! You’ve got mail! Mail! You’ve got- Goodbye!

I have no penis
I have no penis

Fridge. Largemeat. Butch.
Deadlift. Slab. Bulkhead.
Flint. Chesthair.
It’s great to be here with you young witches, on this fabulous night.
Remember girls, show the world.
Happy birthdaaaaaugh!
Let them know it’s ha-hallow—ha-halloween.

I… have… no… peeeeeeniiiiss…

I’m wearing brown pants.

[noise]

[unintelligible]

Arnold’s coming to town.
He’s going to — and he’s going to break your legs.
With a m—uh—with a monkey wrench.
I’m going to break your legs with a monkey wrench until you die.
Because I’m Arnold Schwarzeneg—
Oh, oops… *cough* Sorry about that.
Sometimes my voice goes a little weird when I’m talking in my normal voice, like this.
It just goes all weird like that; I don’t know why.
I’m going to have to see a doctor about it.
If he tries to touch my pee-pee, I’m going to break his hair.
With a monkey wrench.

Hi! We’re the Wiggles! And welcome to our wiggly website!
Hi! We’re the Wiggles! And welcome to our wiggly website!
Wiener, wiener, wien-wien-wiener

I am Mr. Milky Toes, and

I wear pantyhose

I gotta have more cowbell!

Hrngh… who is the fat man, I wonder? And how does he fit into this sinister puzzle?

I have no penis

Sreggit tuoba gniht lufrednow eht

Woo Woo Woo Woo Woo Woo
Weeee Weeee Weeee Weeee Weeee!


Welcome! Welcome! welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
You’ve got- Welcome!
Welcome! Welcome!
Mail! Welcome! You’ve got-

Neem een ander in de maling (Ah ah ah yeah)
Loop niet an m’n kop te zeuren (Oewoho oewoho)
Jij mot niet so ouwehoere (Ah ah ah yeah)
Aàh, alle vrouwen zijn ‘t zelfde (Oewoho oewoho)

I have no penis
I have no penis
I have pe- I have pe- I have pe-
I have no penis

I’ma Wario! I’ma gonna win!
Wee hee, I got it!
Aiaiaiayia!
[splurt]