[Intro: Jon Snow & SpongeBob SquarePants]
Unknown P, you are the hottest in the game so far
Keep shelling old boy
Alright, put the money in the bag
Put it in!

[Verse 1: Unknown P]
People say I'm a joke rapper
'Cause I spit now, and I choke after
Eating sweeties with no wrapper
Telling lies, no papa (No)
Funny guy 'cause I'm so dapper
Big Shaq but I flow faster
Jerk rice 'cause I'm so rasta (Mmm)
Church twice 'cause I'm so pastor

[Verse 2: Unknown P]
Won't hit a man, but Horace might (Yeah)
Leave the scene on a Boris bike
I'm a North lad on a Norwich height
You're a schoolboy, you're a cottage type
Crowd pleaser like blackjack
Ride 'round in a flat cap
I'm self made like a flat pack
Got a posh 'ting with a fat back (Mmm)
[Verse 3: Unknown P]
Emcees are surprised how I came on the scene
I did it with half of your team, sipping on lean
Drinking my ? with green, while you men are sitting in creams
Two tracks, both bangers
Wes Nelson, doppelgänger (Boing)
Fresh youth from a different cloth
Fire in the booth, Charlie Sloth

[Outro: Unknown P]
Go on Charlie, I know you want to you cheeky little sausage
And to everyone who doesn't think so, bugger off opposition!