Glad I’m Not Yew

I don't claim to ride a bike

With long black hair to show my might

I don't follow the latest styles

They make me throw up bright green bile

I don't have to shave my head

Or walk around and beg for bread

I don't have big ears that stick out

Or act like my parents threw me out!



Don't parade around town

Or shoot up glue that gets me down

I don't have lots of holes in my arm

And haven't used up all my charms

Don't go to clubs 'cause I think it's cool

And hang out with all the fools



So glad

Oh so glad

I'm not you



I don't sit in a highrise office

And think about how much money I make

I don't have a greasy toupee or walk around with hair that's fake

Dont have pearls, or cars or furs

Only cowboy boots, no spurs

No silk sheets apon my bed

Glad I'm not you, I'd rather be dead!



I have acid wash, but no poodle hair

Thats why I shot you that ugly stare

No high heels with jeans and socks

I rather have a bagel, hold the lox

No tan in the middle of winter

I'd rather have a ten foot splinter



So glad

Oh so glad

I'm not you