Zager and Evans
Fred
On a white enamled road
They pulled him from his mother's womb
Hanging from his heels he cried
And everyone put on their smiles
Ugly red, and dripping wet
They put him in a bassinet
Tiny toes and fingernails
His daddy said "He'll go to Yale,"
Such was the first day for Fred

When he reached the age of nine
He killed a frog with a kitchen knife
He broke the wing of a noble bird
He took a jagged rock, his sling-shot hurled

When he reached ten
He stole the neighbor's guinea hen
Wrapped its beak in masking tape
It starved to death in thirteen days
Such was the tenth year of Fred

When Fred was sweet sixteen
He robbed the neighborhood Dairy Queen
He drove away in his daddy's car
— He didn't get far
The local buzz hauled him away
He went to trial the very next day
Found guilty, the sixteenth year for Fred
And his daddy cried
"Oh Fred, Fred, where'd we go wrong?"
"We used to buy you things, I though we got along,"
"Though, Fred, Fred, you been livin' a life of sin,"
"Tell me Fred, what are we gonna tell our friends?"

When Fred was twenty one
He was well prepared for things to come
He' learned to kill, hate and steal
Now uncle Sam offers better deals
When [?] good men like you, my boy
[?]
It takes aggression and the will of steal
And mainly we got a bullet to