There's a place some of us choose to live
Gated community - cops can't come in
A neighborhood for punks over the hill
We'll spend our golden years in Mattersville

We could do whatever we want, whenever we please
There's always a keg of beer and a block of cheese
We've got Carroms, Pitfall, Asteroids, Space Invaders, and Missile Command

We will grow old together
We will play bridge and Texas Hold 'Em
Duane and Stevie Cab, they still skateboard
But most of us lawn bowl and shuffleboard
We may be getting ripe, but we ain't bored

We got a blackboard with some rules and laws
Hefe's got an eighteen car garage
Most of the cars are smashed, and so is Spike
Twice a week on karaoke night

Eric Melvin lives nextdoor to me
Limo and the "Lochness" head security
At the end of my cul-de-sac
Davey Havok's house is painted black

We will grow old and fatter
We got our ville, so what else matters?
Trashy, Mod and Kath are staying up
Nathan, Matt, and Dad are passing out
When California cracks, we're all going down
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