I first heard Frank say, he wanted to dress like Fay Wray
I wanted that too but what could I do in junior high school in L.A
My heart skipped in the scene, he said you gotta be it, not just dream
It was a taboo I knew I wouldn’t pursue, I didn’t have the self esteem

I gotta confess that I like to cross dress
And I’ve been doing it since I was 13
It’s hard to tell bros that you wear women’s clothes
Even in the “open minded” punk scene
You’d probably get hurt in heels and a skirt
When you’re in the middle of a circle pit
So I’d only wear panties under boxers to keep it all a secret
Now I’m telling everyone cuz it’s fun and I don’t give a shit

Forward 30 years, I still had the same fears
Then I saw Hedwig play a Bilgewaters gig
And I felt the same envy and tears
I decided right there, I can’t be bothered to care
What other people think, I’m gonna dye my pubes pink
And throw out all my Hanes underwear

I’m not transgender, I’m a lazy crossdresser
Who thinks make up is too much of an ordeal
I paint my toes and wear shiny tight clothes
Not for the look but how it makes me feel
I don’t need things just right, I’m a tranvest-lite
I only shave to do the Time Warp midnight Saturday
I’m done with self-pity, I don’t have to feel shitty
Cuz I wanna look pretty so I give it the old city college try
Don’t get me wrong, I still wanna be a guy
Who sometimes likes to dress like a girl
He sometimes likes to wear diamonds and pearls
Don’t think I don’t know I’m not foolin’ anyone
He’s a cross between Adele and Charlie Chaplin
You know it’s not just girls who just wanna have fun!