The Art of the Deal

Some guys write poems and beautiful words
Some guys write songs about flowers and birds
But that ain't who I am, that kinda crap ain't me

No no

Some guys paint sculptures in plastic and steel
Some losers paint paintings abstract and surreal
But I don't get it, that kinda crap ain't me
Can't you see

Oh, the only art I've ever been able to feel
Is the only art that matters
The Art of the Deal

There's nothing better or quite as sublime
As signing your name on the dotted line
That's all the beauty I need in my life
That and a big-titty Eastern Bloc wife

Oh, the only art I've ever been able to feel
The only art that gets me off
Is the Deal
Some people make TV shows
Like Golden Girls or Diff'rent Strokes
Some people make We are the Worlds
And give American money to some African folks

[But that ain't me]
I'm on my own
[But that ain't me]
I shall over-comb
That ain't the man you see shaking your hand

And oh
The only art that matters ain't Picasso or Pollock
It ain't Warhol, Van Gogh, Rothko
Dali, Mondrian, or Ron Popeil
The only art that matters is the one that makes me squeal

So forget those other losers
It's the Art of the Deal
The Art of the Deal
[Art of the Deal]