[Hook]
News is the tool that is abused to fool
You and to leave you scared and confused
Trews is like the news if the news was true
I want some trews! Let's have some trews!

[Verse 1]
(How'd you dooo?)
It's David unbiased v Goliath of liars
It's coming straight from the highest
Rapacious place of deniers
Who might just break in the face of defiance
Making alliance, spread like contagion and viruses
Violent fires and riots are not the way that we make them retire
Nah, we make it a science
Changing the minds of the nation
Break the supply and the chain should
Fade and then dry up, deny the paper Messiah
And face him straight in the eye
And I proclaim it a triumph (Elementary!)
You haven't got to be Sherlock to see
That Rupert Murdoch's obscene
A dude that murders the meaning
Of truth and turns it to green
They serve a political agenda
Take words and then stick them in a blender
Never give a shit on whether it'll offend you
Outing a gay politician as a bender
We discussed it, we're disgusted!
Given up on even trying to trust it
Step on up and get a better look
As I chuck a mega left hook at Rebekah Brooks
No punches pulled, don't pull the wool over Bull
You won't fool us all, we've no senses dulled
You, you've no sense at all
[Hook]
News is the tool that is abused to fool
You and to leave you scared and confused
Trews is like the news if the news was true
I want some trews! Let's have some trews!

[Ad-lib]
I have more things to say

[Verse 2]
Newspapers use acres of trees to make us believe
There is a reason the name is "make believe"
Pied papers are plaguing the streets
Hate's a seed and when you plant it
It propagates like a weed 'til you stamp it
I hate to be so pedantic
But in the papers I see the semantics
Like I'm reading a pamphlet on ways
You can be sycophantic to media magnates
I'm not going to let you feed me a sandwich
Of the sneakiest devious language
To seize the advantage of people in grief
And in anguish seems underhanded
Consequently we feel disenchanted and rant at it
In the manner Russel Brand did
It's called not taking freedom for granted
It's the reason I'm free to be candid
To rap about deviant antics
Like taking my penis and wanking it
Hey! We lower the tone! Page 3, throw us a bone!
Tabloids make you sick for weeks
So stick broadsheets 'twixt your cheeks
Use them to brush the poo that's encrusted
Just like glue to the tuft of pubes on your nuts
We're wiping out bums, booties and butts with your views
And the loos have been flushed
There ain't no news you can trust:
All points of views are corrupt
Them, me, you and even Russ
To an extent we're all deluded and bluffed
But would you figure us to collude to corrupt
In a cruel and unjust and inhuman abuse
Of your customers' trust and deluge them with guff
Titillation, boobies and lust
Who's in a state with the booze and the drugs
Or their bruises and cuts and who's upper crust?
Clue: when you're stuck to deduce a spoof from the truth
It is prudent to look for proof in the fluff
It may take humour and guts but we refuse to give up
Even if we look kind of stupid and stuff
Who gives a fuck?!
[Hook]
News is the tool that is abused to fool
You and to leave you scared and confused
Trews is like the news if the news was true
I want some trews! Let's have some trews!