Dan Bull
How To Pick Between Milibands
[Verse 1]
Who should be the leader, who should be in control?
Is it Venus, Serena? Liam or Noel?
Hmm, Dave and Edward, man, who to choose?
It's like picking between Jake and Elwood Blues
To me, to you, the leader, who should it be?
I haven't got a clue so let's see:
Being sons of a Marxist Jewish refugee
Left a mark to ensure they would be MPs
State educated, dedicated to their destiny
Craved a piece of the cake but needed the recipe
Each gained a place at Balliol college
Studied PPE and attained all the knowledge
That they need, eg. how to shake all the wallets
Of their patrons and make them pay for their political promises
David Claydon, Sainsbury and a whole great heap of lobbyists
It's ominous

[Chorus]
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands

[Verse 2]
Now we've seen the similarities between the Milibands
So we should really have a little gander at disparities
Dave could have been a model in a magazine
While Edward resembles a model made of plasticine
David's New Labour: centrist sensibilities
While Edward entertains more leftist connectivity
But more importantly, Ed supports Leeds
While Arsenal are David's favourite football team
It's a shame that waving a banana
Creates such a major public relations disaster
But hey, didn't New Labour embark
On this image-centric situation to start with?
Plus there's other candidates that are clamouring to be grand champion
So let's take a second to step off the Milibandwagon
Also standing we have Diane Abbott
The female's favourite; Labour's Rampant Rabbit
Other candidates include Andy Burnham
Who's some random that I haven't really heard of
And then there's Ed Balls, a slightly slimy bloke
Who should form a comedy duo with Michael Gove
But their odds of winning are longer than the prose
In Tony Blair's new book, and equally as overblown
Gordon's overthrown so who'll go for the throne?
Will it be Kylie Miliband or Danni Mili Minogue?
[Chorus]
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands
Here's some help if you can't understand
How to pick between Milibands