[Hook]
Eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh
(Goose on the loose)
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
(Goose on the loose)
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
(Goose on the loose)
Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh

[Chorus]
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
From a two foot, waddling, douche-nozzle goose

[Verse 1]
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
Reduce you to tears and then poof, I vamoose
Reappear here with my beak up your caboose
'Til I'm touching you gooch
What you gonna do? No sleuth can deduce the truth
There isn't proof, asshole nuisance in a whole new sense
Come on! I'm just helping you relax, you're too sense
I'm cataclysmic, it's kind of characteristic of my habit for mischief
Standing in your cabbages and having a quick shit
I'm a little bit savage when I'm nabbing your jam sandwiches
And wrecking your picnic
No one saw me, definitely didn't threaten the witness
Nevertheless, I suggest you mind your own business
From gardener, to grocer, to butcher, to baker
You can all suck my cloaca
[Chorus]
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
From a two foot, waddling, douche-nozzle goose

[Verse 2]
When I cause a commotion, I show no emotion
Throw your clothes in the water, they're soaking
So what? I'm doing your laundry, throw the soap in
I wonder how good a radio is at floating
Oopsie! Was that yours? Oh well, broken
Ooh! The grocer's is open, I'm going in
And I won't be coming back out 'til they're closing
I pick and mix my mischief in the moment
It's as if they mixed Pixar with The Omen
A pitch black heart, even darker than Dolan
Roll up, I'm smoking dope on Joe Rogan
Going rogue, quacking unintelligible slogans
Honk, honk, noot, noot
What a cutie, come on
Shake your tail feather, waddle that booty
If you wanna get down, you gotta catch me
Fuck factory farming, don't @ me
[Chorus]
Goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
From a two foot, waddling, douche-nozzle goose
(Goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
From a two foot, waddling, douche-nozzle goose)

[Breakdown]

[Verse 3]
"This is targeted harassment"
Blah, blah, blah
Might I inquire, did you ask if you could try my foie gras?
Aha! Thought not, better leave your door locked
'Cause I'm a big bird and you're a small cock
Aw, what's the matter? Did I prod a little sore spot?
Next time, I'm gonna rip your mother-clucking balls off
I'll make your jaw drop with all the stuff I pilfer
Fuck swans! Hashtag no filter
I'm just telling the truth
Diligently pillaging the villagers of any shred of dignity
My goodness, what a silly goose
Pick up the Vinny Noose and Russell of Rockit
If all the stuff in your pocket's of any use
Then I've already got it
I'm not stopping always shopping for new ways
To ruin days, I'ma plumate Saddam Hussein
I'll hide your boots or untie your shoelace
Then I take you on another wild goose chase
[Chorus]
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
Get ready for abuse from a goose on the loose
I'm a goose on the loose
Get ready for abuse
From a two foot, waddling, douche nozzle goose

[Outro]
Might as well have fun
'Cause your happiness is done when your goose is cooked
Making you jump when the goose bumps
I'm leaving you shook
(I'm leaving you shook
I'm leaving you shook, I'm leaving you shook
When the goose bumps, I'm leaving you shook)