[Intro]
DJ!

[Verse 1]
(Badum, badum, badum, badum)
(Badum, badum, badum, badum)
Downloadable content's a load of nonsense
I won't give them one cent
It wouldn't be conscientious
Encouraging dodgy ventures
Like when you've been robbed
Do you get your property straight back from the fences?
I want to know what the defence is
Hence this musical census
Pay attention to community consensus
To prevent this backlash of hashtags
And truly contentious lambasts, eg:
I hope you're shoving your Prothean
Up your fallopian
No wonder the planet's becoming dystopian
Draconian Napoleons invoking pandemonium
And I might be blowing my own euphonium
By quoting this
But I know I'm not the only one that's pissed
My data's trapped inside the disc
Sat in lines of script
And I have to pay to take it out
What kind of shit is this?
[Hook]
It's the DLC PLC
Where we make money selling people things that were free
Welcome to the DLC, the PLC
Where we charge you for things you bought previously

[Verse 2]
No need to be dishonest
The incompleted product's a piece of bollocks
So please give me the pieces of it
And leave my wallet, I need the dollars
But don't be extremely bothered
I'll probably buy the sequel of it
Cause that's the key
The reason it keeps on happening, it's obvious
If you pay them quids they take the piss
And get away with it
Until they're pinching all your paper
Like a paperclip
And what would our forefathers
Have thought of horse armour?
It's all rather an awful palava
Perhaps I should make a call and talk to Obama
You're causing drama
And according to the laws of karma
Stir the water, sure enough
Of course you'll taunt the poor piranhas
So try to pull my jaws apart
I'm sure you can't
I'm sinking my teeth into the greed
Inherently buried in DLC things
Hidden fees and prices surprising me like bee stings
Is it any wonder we punters are seething
[Hook]
At the DLC PLC
Where we make money selling people things that were free
Welcome to the DLC, the PLC
Where we charge you for things you bought previously

(Okay, you'll recognize this one))

[Verse]
Who's rapping? Dovahkiin
Dragons? I'm not over keen
I'll dice 'em like a knife slicing right through an aubergine
My dragon shout flow is sweeter than a soda stream
You won't believe your eyes, I'm like an overload of dopamine
A broadsword in one hand and a magic spell in the other
I'm the last of the Dragonborn, there's no other, my brother, so run for cover
If you got scales, then I'm on your tail and I will not fail
Like a free-roaming sandbox game, I'm off the rails
I'll walk the trails through awful gales
And storms of hail 'til all the nails are knocked into your coffin
I'm not stopping 'til you're impaled and I've prevailed
In the name of the Nords, I pray to the Lords
You'll all get a taste of the blade of my sword
I'm taking on hordes of enemies
I face them with hoards of weaponry
They're draining my force
So chemistry comes into play with retorts and recipes
Alchemixing like a DJ
Restoration, restore my energy
My legacy, odyssey, elegy, prophecy's
Written in heavenly bodies
And buried with every body
That ever did bother to mess with me
Deading them terribly, horribly
I'm a celebrity, honestly
You're a wannabe, I'm a prodigy
The suggestion you're better than me at being a warrior? Ha! Comedy
It's a gift to me
I don't just spit flames lyrically but literally
And the Elder Scrolls are scripts in which I've written your obituary
I am the Dragonborn, wearing a hat with badass horns
I'm Dovahkiin, known globally, you're nobody at all
[Outro]
Thank you! Thanks everyone for coming out, it's been a great night, thank you so much guys