I found myself on a bar room floor
I had drank so much I couldn’t drink no more
So I fell asleep with a troubled brain
And dreamed that I rode on a down bound train

The boiler was filled with blood and beer
The devil himself was the engineer
The passengers were most a decadent crew
Some were foreigners and others I knew
Rock stars in velvet, gay boys in drag
Beautiful groupies, and wicked old hags
They fed the fire with human bones
While the furnace rang with a thousand groans

As the train rushed on at a terrible pace
Sulphuric fumes scorched our hands and face
Wider and wider the country grew
Faster and faster the engine flew
Louder and louder the thunder crashed
Brighter and brighter the lighting flashed
Hotter and hotter the air became
Till our clothes were burnt to a quivering flame

Then out of the distance there came a yell
’Look here’ - said the devil - ‘We're nearing home’
Oh how those passengers shrieked with pain
And begged old Satan to stop that down bound train