Harold the Barrel
News: A well-known Bognor restaurant-owner disappeared early this morning. Last seen in a mouse-brown overcoat. Suitably camouflaged
They saw him catch a train

Man-in-the-street: Father of three it's disgusting
Such a horrible thing to do. Harold the Barrel cut off his toes and he served them all for tea
He can't go far. He can't go far. Hasn't got a leg to stand on. He can't go far

Man-on-the-spot: I'm standing in a doorway on the main square. Tension is mounting. There's a restless crowd of angry people

Man-on-the-council:
More than we've еver seen. Had to tighten up security

Ovеr to the scene at the town hall. The Lord Mayor's ready to speak

LORD MAYOR:
Man of suspicion, you can't last long, the British Public is on our side

BRITISH PUBLIC:
You can't last long. You can't last long. Said you couldn't trust him, his brother was just the same
You can't last long

HAROLD:
If I was many miles from here. I'd be sailing in an open boat on the sea. Instead I'm on this window ledge. With the whole world below. Up at the window. Look at the window
Mr. Plod:
We can help you
Plod's Chorus:
We can help you
Mr. Plod:
We're all your friends if you come on down and talk to us son

HAROLD:
You must be joking. Take a running jump

The crowd was getting stronger and our Harold getting weaker. Forwards, backwards, swaying side to side. Fearing the very worst. They called his mother to the site. Up on the ledge beside him
His mother made a last request

67-yr-old Mrs. Barrel: "Come off the ledge, if your father were alive he'd be very, very, very upset. You just can't jump. You just can't jump. Your shirt's all dirty and there's a man here from the B.B.C
You just can't jump

Mr. Plod:
We can help you

Plod's Chorus:
We can help you

Mr. Plod:
We're all your friends if you come on down and talk to us Harry

HAROLD:
You must be joking. Take a running jump