[Verse 1]
Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and fate
I was around when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

[Chorus]
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

[Verse 2]
I stuck around St. Petersburg
When I saw it was a time for change
I killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain
And I rode a tank
Held a general's rank
When the Blitzkrieg raged
And the bodies stank
[Chorus]
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

[Verse 3]
I watched with glee
While your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades
For the Gods they made
I shouted out
"Who killed the Kennedys?"
When after all
It was you and me

[Verse 4]
Let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid tracks for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay

[Chorus]
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game
[Verse 5]
Just as every cop is a criminal
And all you sinner's Saints
As heads is tails
Just call me Lucifer
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint

[Verse 6]
So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy and some taste
Use all your well learned qualities
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, hey

[Chorus]
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game