[Intro: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande]
I've had so much sex
I cannot walk straight
And that’s why I'm walking side to side

[Verse 1: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande, Gym Women]
My boyfriend is big and I've got a very small tiny body
He's hung like a horse and I'm like a jockey
And I spend all my free time riding (Time riding)
And that's the reason I'm walking like my legs are made of rubber
She’s been playing too much hide the cucumber (Ick!)
That poor girl her condition’s frightening

[Pre-Chorus 1: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande, Gym Women]
My friends say, "You have sex too much!"
I think they're just jealous
No, we're worried you'll die!

[Chorus 1: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande, Gym Women]
No, I won't, I'm fine
Ooh, time to get laid!
My god she’s never satisfied! (Satisfied)
Were you in a fight?
No, I just got banged so hard
I bounced off the bed four times (Bed four times)
[Refrain 1: Tiffany Tynes as Nicki Minaj]
Uh, yo
There's a new law
I have to feature on every single X-rated sex song
And show off my big fat jiggly bum
While I sing and rap lyrics full of dumb sex puns

[Verse 2: Tiffany Tynes as Nicki Minaj]
Ariana's body's itsy-bitsy
Got lots of meat on my bones
Ariana's too skinny, that's why she keeps having sex injuries, huh
She'd have no problem if she got a fake ass like me
Big booty, bouncing on any dude who do me
Two thick fat pillows provide backside protection to me
Get tough, having sex ain't kid stuff
This ain’t "Sam and Cat" or that crap “Victorious”

[Pre-Chorus 2: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande]
My friends said I have sex too much
That I should learn mouth stuff
So I gave that a try

[Chorus 2: Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande]
Lost sight in this eye
Broke both of my legs (Broke both my legs, baby)
And now he got me rolling side to side (Side to side, ooh yeah)
I fractured my spine (Fractured my spine, baby)
And cracked my pelvis (Cracked my pelvis, baby, ooh baby)
Now from the waist down, I'm paralyzed (Paralyzed)
[Outro: Tiffany Tynes as Nicki Minaj, Devyn Deloera as Ariana Grande, Bart Baker as doctor]
Uh, yo
Shouldn't you be in a hospital bed?
The doctor said, meet him here instead
Let’s see now...well, the news isn’t great
You've had too much sex, we’ll have to amputate!