[Chorus: Charlie Scene & Deuce]
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

[Intro: Funny Man]
Ho, ho, ho, merry Christmas!

[Chorus: Deuce]
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

[Verse 1: J-Dog, Charlie Scene & Both]
J-J-J-Just a little story about last Christmas
About some bad kids who were full of wishes
We gave some gifts and then we gave some loving
The weird kind of love that you give to your cousin
Little Jimmy stole from 7-Eleven
So we stopped by his house with a pair of sevens
We drank in his room with some dude named Kevin
But there were still some bad kids who deserved some presents
Zack got caught with a bottle of Jack
So we slipped down his chimney with an eighteen pack
He didn't leave cookies, but we needed a snack
So we took the beer back and I fucked him in the ass!
It's Charlie Scene, got eggnog in my flask
The holidays are back, and all my presents are wrapped
Like "Oh my God, is that Saint Nick?"
Kids, give me your list like it's the twenty-fifth
Been accused of being a bad kid
B-B-But I get presents as is
Mrs. Claus just MySpace'd me
I blew off a date on Christmas Eve
So I don't give a fuck if you're naughty or nice
You might still get a Rollie and a gang of ice
So write your list and never have no fear
Have a Hollywood Christmas and an Undead New Year!
Fuck yeah!
[Refrain: Funny Man]
Now watch the language, ho, ho, ho!

[Chorus: Deuce]
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

[Verse 2: Johnny 3 Tears, Da Kurlzz, & Funny Man]
I'm about to serve it up for all you boys and girls
Good kids, bad kids, and even Da Kurlzz
We were chilling at home and decking the halls
So I checked my phone and Santa had called
He said he'd swing by at a quarter to 12
He said that his jolly ass needed some help
He said Christmas ain't a day, but a way of life
"If you guide my sleigh, I'll let you fuck my wife"
So we jumped in his sleigh, and it started to jingle
Funnier than fuck, you can ask Chris Kringle
So we all took flight but something was fishy
He asked for road head and started to kiss me
Underneath his suit was just a bunch of pillows
Instead of bags of presents, he had bags of dildos
I pulled down his beard and it was a monster
It wasn't Saint Nick, it was a fucking imposter
When we found out, he started to pout
I took my bandanna and I choked him out
I pulled off his beard, then I fucked his mouth
Hijacked his sleigh and headed down south
I've had a lot of wild nights but tonight was the craziest
I've met a lot of Jeffs, but this one was shadiest
When it comes to cheer, that motherfucker's a Grinch
So if you don't like Christmas, fuck you, bitch!
[Refrain: Funny Man]
You kids are in big trouble, oh boy, ho, ho

[Chorus: Deuce]
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe, let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk

[Bridge: Deuce & Funny Man]
Let's get drunk
Ho, ho, hey
Looks like Santa had a little too much Manischewitz and eggnog
Let's get drunk, let's get drunk, let's get drunk, let's get drunk
Hey, Hollywood Undead, you're pretty naughty this year
I ain't visiting you faggots, oh
Let's get drunk

[Chorus: Deuce]
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk
It's Christmas in Hollywood, Santa's back up in the hood
So meet me under the mistletoe let's fuck
It's Hanukkah in Inglewood, the dreidel's spinning in the hood
So meet me by the menorah, let's get drunk