[BILL, spoken]
Gentlemen, Bill's Beer and Music Hall proudly presents the Queen of the Loop, Mammy Wurlitzer!

[SAM, spoken]
Like that old dame says in the play, "You can do whatever you like to me, but I'll still be Mother Goddam."
(sung)
Mother Goddam's dive in Mandalay
Seven rotten boards out in the bay
Goddam, go tell that girl to get her ass in gear
There's fifteen guys already lined up along the pier
Watches in their hands and shouting "Hey!"

[GANG]
Hey! Hey! Hey!

[SAM]
Is there just one girl in Mandalay?"
All the girls are cute as they can be
Even if they won't put out for free
Life would be so simple
Everything in order
If the guy who's in there
Wasn't so damn slow
Take your forty-five and shoot the door down
Tell that guy in there he's holding up the show
Faster Johnny, hey
Faster Johnny, hey
Sing the man the song of Mandalay
[SAM & GANG]
Love doesn't have days and weeks to be reckoned
Johnny, come on, don't you dare waste a second
Will the moon shine every night over you, Mandalay?
Will the moon shine every night over you?

[SAM]
Mother Goddam's dive in Mandalay
Now it's rotting underneath the bay
Goddam, that girl in there can rest her little rear
There's not a single client out waiting on the pier
No more watches left, no shouts of "Hey!"

[GANG]
Hey, hey, hey

[SAM]
Not a single soul in Mandalay
Once the girls were cute as they could be
Now there's not a one that's worth her fee
Life's no longer simple
Nothing is in order
There's no place like Goddam's
All of them are gone
No more forty-fives to shoot the door down
Where there's no one, the show just can't go on
Faster Johnny, hey
Faster Johnny, he
Sing the man the song of Mandalay
[SAM & GANG]
Love doesn't have days and weeks to be reckoned
Johnny, come on, don't you dare waste a second
Will the moon shine every night over you, Mandalay?
Will the moon shine every night over you?