We're a couple of swells
We stop at the best hotels
But we prefer the country
Far away from the city smells
We're a couple of sports
The pride of the tennis courts
In June, July and August
We look cute when we're dressed in shorts
The Vanderbilts have asked us up for tea
We don't know how to get there, no siree
No siree

We would drive up the avenue
But we haven't got the price
We could skate up the avenue
But there isn't any ice
We would ride on a bicycle
But we haven't got a bike
So we'll walk up the avenue
Yes we'll walk up the avenue
And to walk up the avenue's what we like

Wall Street bankers are we
With plenty of currency
We'd open up the safe
But we forgot where we put the key
We're the favorite lads
Of girls in the picture ads
We'd like to tell you who we kissed last night
But we can't be cads
The Vanderbilts are waiting at the club
But how are we to get there? That's the rub
That's the rub
We could sail up the avenue
But we haven't got a yacht
We could drive up the avenue
But the horse we had was shot
We could ride on a trolley car
But we haven't got the fare
So we'll walk up the avenue
Yes we'll walk up the avenue
Yes we'll walk up the avenue 'til we're there

We would swim up the avenue
But we haven't got a lake
So we'll walk up the avenue
Yes we'll walk up the avenue
Yes a walk up the avenue's what we'll take