If I'd known about an angry wife with a two by four
If I'd only listened when you told me about a mother in law
If I'd known how much things change when you say, "I do"
Well, I wouldn't have done what I did, I'm telling you

I would've had dogs, I would've had dogs
If I'd known then what I know now
Well, I would've had dogs

I was led by the nose like a bull from the very start
And I must say I really enjoyed the beginning part
You know your favorite food and the bed and the lights now low
But then the kids come along and romance has to go

Well, I should've had dogs, oh, I should've had dogs
If I'd known then what I know now
Well, I would've had dogs

Suddenly they seem to arrive in two's and three's
Any ordinary man would be brought to his knees
She says, "Daddy can I have that dress and I want that hat"
How can any daddy tell her, "No", when she asks like that

Oh, I should've had dogs, oh, I should've had dogs
If I'd known then what I know now
Well, I would've had dogs
Now my eldest son has survived till 17
And I'm the stupidest man that the world has ever seen
I'm wrong about everything in his young life
And the endless thing I'm wrong about lead to strife

Oh, I should've had dogs, oh, I should've had dogs
If I'd known then what I know now
Well, I would've had dogs

It's said that trial and tribulation ends
And they all grow up and you all get to be friends
I can't wait for the day I know will come to pass
When they have kids of their own and I can laugh

Oh, you should've had dogs, oh, you should've had dogs
If you'd known then what I know now
Well, you would've had dogs

Oh, you should've had dogs, oh, you should've had dogs
If they put you what you put me through
Well, you wish you'd had dogs