[WILL]
In West Philadelphia, born and raised
On the playground is where I spent most of my days
When a coupla guys, they were up to no good
Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said

[WILL'S MOM]
You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air

[WILL]
I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air

Turns out, the guys I fought weren't regular thugs
They were a powerful gang runnin' guns and drugs
And because of our fight, one went to jail
So they followed me all the way out to Bel-Air

[THUG]
Y'all ready to do this? Let's go to Bel-Air and kill that nerd!

[WILL]
They barged right through the door, started trashin' the place
My Uncle Phil got all up in the leader's face
He said
[UNCLE PHIL]
Son, I'm a judge, so you better think twice

[WILL]
Then they beat my Uncle Phil within an inch of his life

[UNCLE PHIL]
Call somebody, Carlton!

[WILL]
Carlton pissed his khakis and snitched me out

[CARLTON]
He's hiding outside in the pool house

[WILL]
So I got out of there as quick as I came
Lay low in a motel hidin' from that gang
Then this lady showed up, and here's what she said

[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
I'm FBI, you stay here, you're dead

[WILL]
At that very moment, I was frozen with fear
She said
[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
You wanna stay alive, you gotta disappear

[WILL]
Cut to the city morgue where I'm scared and confused
She's dressin' a dead body in my clothes and my shoes
Says she needs my teeth and a coupla hairs
To make the thugs think the body's the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

[NEWS ANCHOR]
The body in the car has been identified as a Philadelphia man who, according to friends, enjoyed chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool and

[WILL]
I watched my own funeral from behind a tree
I saw my momma cry as they buried me
I said, "Can I just let her know I'm all right?"
She said

[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
Now you're a ghost, say goodnight

[WILL]
I woke up in a warehouse on a metal seat
With a scary Japanese man lookin' at me

[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
The debt is repaid
[WILL]
The Fed said to the man
Then I asked her, "Yo, what the f--- is happenin'?"
She said

[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
I'm not FBI, but I'm sorry I used you
But my father owes a lotta money to the yakuza

[WILL]
So all of this was just a crazy ploy?

[HENCHMAN]
Silence, worm! You're a nobody boy

[WILL]
Didn't know what that was, didn't wanna find out
But they burned off my fingerprints and duct-taped my mouth
Then gunshots, and the henchman dropped
The Philly thugs entered holding nines and Glocks

[THUG]
Yo, Philly's my town, Yoshira

[WILL]
Said the thug to the man

[THUG]
So gather up your crew and go back to Japan

[WILL]
The man just smiled and quietly answered

[YAKUZA BOSS]
Gentlemen, please teach our guests some manners

[WILL]
Both crews opened up, bullets flyin' past
The redhead got hit with a shotgun blast
In the center stood a man, nobody knew who he was

[THUG]
Who the hell are you?

[UNCLE PHIL]
You can call me The Judge

[WILL]
Woo! Uncle Phil said

[UNCLE PHIL]
You need to get off the grid!
You can never go back to the life that you lived

[WILL]
So I crawled on the floor past the red-headed traitor
And her last words were

[MYSTERIOUS WOMAN]
Yo homes, smell ya later

[WILL]
And that's my story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside-down
And if anybody asks, just sit right there
And tell 'em I became Jasper Mitchell of White Ridge, New Hampshire