Frank Lieberman
Identity Gone Wrong Part 2
Narcissism is another danger that is self-directed throughout life. For instance, there can be a healthy or normal narcissist. On the other hand, unhealthy narcissism interferes with the ability to have appropriate and meaningful interpersonal relationships. This is because there is persistent behavior with excessive preoccupation with oneself and one’s concerns. Unfortunately, this psychological impairment persists in behaviors that seek pleasure and/or gratification from others. There is simply little concern about the needs, safety or welfare of the other. It’s about me, me, me, and only me in that order.
Having a sense of my personal space and the personal space of another is another important psychological quality. Personal space is made up of thoughts, ideas, impulses, fantasies, and constraints or limits on attitude, actions or behavior. Likewise, the personal space of another is made up of the same. Mature individuals take into account the respect for the other. Without respecting the other, leads to aggressive, insensitive and sadistic interpersonal interactions. Certainly groping, kissing, grinding talking disparagingly about another is simply rule and sadistic.
With impairment in developing trust, a healthy amount of narcissism, along with boundary limits affects the development of identity or self. Without a clear sense of identity development, the danger is the development of role confusion. This means there is the danger of over dedication of heroes, reality TV stars, celebrities, and other power figures. There is a tendency to become part of the moment by becoming part of a cliques, and then part of mob vitriol. How can one fall in love, let alone develop a sense of intimacy or fidelity, without having a sense of mature identity?
Imperative, without a secure sense of identity development, leads to the exclusion of others that are different, such as in skin color, cultural background, etc. The stereotypes, loyalties, morality, ideology and appropriate behavior gets lost with a series of rationalizations, distortions and irrational thinking. This pathology leads to treating others of the opposite sex inappropriately.
We require more than a discussion of appropriate and inappropriate behavior. It is simply nonsense to believe that these sadistic behaviors in males are part of being normal. It’s not normal nor is it typical in healthy psychological development. To consider these behaviors normal, speaks to the unhealthy view of that voice and that voice alone. For me, the issue is the development of a healthy identity leads to healthy male behavior.
PS
For Trump, a main drive is the exploitation of another. Remember, vocal or physical expression- behavior, is about making choices. Exploitation or choice can be expressed in the arena of achieving power; making money; or attaining sex.