[Intro]
Time to take out the menorahs

[Chorus]
Put on your yarmulke
Its time for Chanukah
So much fun-ukah
To celebrate Chanukah

[Pre-Verse]
Chanukah is the festival of lights
Instead of one day of presents, we get eight crazy nights
When you feel like the only kid in town without a Christmas tree
Here's a new list of people who are Jewish just like you and me

[Verse 1]
Winona Ryder drinks Manischewitz wine
Then spins a Dreidle with Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein
Guess who gives and receives loads of Chanukah toys
The girls from Veruca Salt and all three Beastie Boys
Lenny Kravitz is half Jewish, Courtney Love is half too
Put them together, what a funky badass Jew
We got Harvey Keitel and flash dancer Jennifer Beals
Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch is Jewish, and yes her boobs are real

[Chorus]
Put on that yarmulke
It's time for Chanukah
Two-time Oscar-winning Dustin Hoffman-aka
Celebrates Chanukah
[Verse 2]
O.J. Simpson, still not a Jew
But guess who is, the guy who does the voice for Scooby-Doo
Bob Dylan was born a Jew, then he wasn't, but now he's back
Mary Tyler Moore's husband is Jewish 'cause we're pretty good in the sack
Guess who got bar-mitzvahed on the PGA tour
No, I'm not talking about Tiger Woods, I'm talkin' about Mr. Happy Gilmore
So many Jews are in the show biz
Bruce Springsteen isn't Jewish but my mother thinks he is

[Chorus]
Tell Daryle Lamonica
It's time to celebrate Chanukah
It's not pronounced Ch-nakah
The C is silent in Chanukah
So read your hooked on phonica
Get drunk in Tijuana-ka
If you really, really wanna-ka
Have a happy happy happy happy Chanukah!