Vitajex! Vitajex!
It'll shrink your belly and improve your (Uh-oh!)
Maybe get your woman really down to size
Make her smell the roses and then cross her eyes
If your sleep is broken and you climb the walls
If you feel just like a mule that is kickin' the stalls
Pop a couple of these until your girlfriend calls out
"Gimme my Vitajex!"

The label might say one or two
But I take them by the handfull; I do what I wanna do
They cure my German Measles and the Hong Kong flu
Gimme my Vitajex!

I used to take one pill to help me get skinny
I used to take one pill to help me get fat
I used to take a potion to make my blood run chill
I never did get over that.

But this will clean your body and improve your mind
Bet you take the girls out more than one at a time
Maybe get your woman really down to size
Make her taste of sugar then cross her (Uh-oh!)

Vitajex! Vitajex!
Of course it's gonna help you zip up your slacks.
Walk around the room and make your husband swoon.
Maybe shrink him down from a big balloon.
Vitajex! Vitajex!
I can tell you more if you would write me some checks.
'Cause the good lord saves just as the lord protects
Gimme my Vitajex!

If your teeth are whistling and your fire is spent
And your knees are buckling and your back is bent
Well this will make you smarter than the President
Gimme my Vitajex! Give it to me!
Gimme my Vitajex! I need another one!
Gimme my Vitajex!