Dan Le Sac vs. Scroobius Pip
Waiting for the beat to kick iné
Silently I step up with a subversive subtext
Trying to feed the need for more than just remedial subjects
Place my faith in the belief that the general public
Will open up their minds to more than just an industry puppet
I ain't a preacher preaching doom and gloom
Well not just yet
But if there's something I feel strongly about
Then I'll discuss it
And if I only make one album before I kick the bucket
I'll hold that album to my heart in my grave and say, "F**k it!"

Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for my feet to grow wings
That lift me above
All of these tiresome things
That we know and love
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for my feet to grow wings
That lift me above
All of these tiresome things
That we know and love
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
A lot of my poems and writings seem to start with me waking up or being in a dream, or a dream-like state
Now, this implies a certain level of abstraction in my work
You might say I'm keeping it surreal but... I'd rather you didn't
The fact is: I sleep a lot. It's as simple as that
Ahah, and I like sleepin' man. It's a nice place to be

...Right

I was walking along through unfamiliar streets
And it felt strange 'cause there didn't seem to be anyone else around
I don't know where I was but it had the feel of New York
But not New York in real life, the New York you see in old films
I can't really explain why it just had that vibe
Every step I took felt somehow more dramatic

So I kept walking and down an alley, behind a bar, sitting on some metal steps I saw a man
From the look and smell of him it was clear he enjoyed a drink
But he wasn't in such a state I felt him to be any kind of irrational threat so I approached him
With due care

"Ah, Mr. Pip," he said out loud
"We've been awaiting you, my name is Elwood P. Dowd."
Now just what he meant by "we" I didn't really get
But all the same I took a seat next to him on the step
He said "You'll meet a few people before this day is through
Who will administer advice and guidelines to you
Now what each of them says I'll tell you now is true
But whether or not you take that advice is for you to choose."
At that point he acted like someone had whispered in his ear
Which, since no one else was there, was pretty damn weird
Awkwardly I looked away and kinda played with my beard
He cleared his throat for a second and then said, "Listen here
In this life you can be oh-so-smart or oh-so-pleasant
For years I was smart; I recommend pleasant
Being smart can make you rich and bring respect and reverence
But the rewards of being pleasant are far more incandescent."
With this information I was encouraged to walk on
I continued alone through these empty streets
Thinking over what Elwood had said
But at the same time thinking about how f**king strange the day had been so far
I was in my own little world when a hand was placed on my chest
And a guy said, "Look out, there's some broken gla** on the floor there."

I looked up
He said, "Hi pleased to meet you, my name is Lloyd Dobler
I'll get straight to the point, won't take too much time from you
I'm probably the youngest person you'll get advice from today
And you may think a guy my age wouldn't have anything to say
But it's said that observation, not old age brings wisdom
And I observe every single life lesson I'm given
I won't attempt to tell you about how to love or be loved
'Cause you get a different genie each time that latern is rubbed
But I will offer you advice on dealing with life
Its ups and its downs
Its troubles and its strifes
Now I'm sure you've had times you've felt down and angry
Wanted to lash out, punch a wall, and be manly
But the question I pose now will offer you a plan B
And maybe some peace and quiet for your friends and family:
How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood
And then just be in a good mood?
That's all I have to say 'cause it's a straight up fact
You control your emotions, it's as simple as that."
He walked off then
Leaving me to contemplate this brief encounter
I barely had time to realize I was being taught something before
He was gone
And I was back on my way

On I walked and almost immediately I spotted the next guide
He couldn't be clearer
This guy was standing on the street corner pacing back and forth
Skinny looking guy, leather jacket, tight jeans, retro look
I've rarely seen someone looking quite so uncomfortable in their own skin
Twitching, smoothing his hair back, kicking the floor, looking up and down the street
He clearly didn't enjoy waiting around, so I approached him quickly
To put him out of his misery
And to let him start his ...spiel

"Hi, my name is Billy Brown
I ain't gonna give you some quote
Instead I'm gonna use some stuff that YOU wrote
'Always had the feeling I could never be the villain
'Cause the villain in the films is always backlit
Always had the feeling I could never be the villain
'Cause the villain in the films is always backlit
Now I find it pleasing to defend myself with reason
But this clock is always sitting on my back
Tick, tick, tick
Then, no explosion but participants erosion
Like a picture over overly exposed and
Like a fox that's been run over in the road and...'
Basically what I'm trying to say to you
Is you don't achieve anything by letting the past rule within you
Getting all pent up and angry about stuff just eats away inside you
What's that other line of yours?
'If you can't forgive and forget, how's this?
Forget forgiving and just accept that that's it.'
See that's how it's gotta be
Then you can fall in love, get on with your life, and be free."

Almost before he could finish that sentence he was off down the street
Hands in his pockets, hurrying away

Now quite accepting of the totally surreal time I was having I rounded the corner
And continued onto my next encounter
Resigned to the fact that this was some kind of dream or hallucination
I made my way through the now-dark street
To the one window that had a light on
I walked through the unlocked door
Which incidentally had blinds down
And a silhouetted figure like a film noir scene
But sadly no sign saying private eye
As I entered a voice promptly said

"This journey's almost over
I'm the only one left
Allow me to introduce myself
My name is Walter Neff
The other guys have taught you things of great positive worth
But I'm afraid I'm here to bring you back down to earth
See you can live your life in control and be nice
But even that will not promise you a happy life
You may think yourself in general to be a nice guy
But I'm telling you now, that right there is a lie
Even the nicest of guys has some nasty within them
You don't have to be backlit to be the villain
Whether it be greed, lust, or just plain vindictiveness
There's a level of malevolence inside of all of us
You can paint yourself and image
And live in your own little dream
But this ain't a dream, it's one big silver screen
So when you think you've got your happy ending don't ever forget
It ain't over 'til you hear the sound of your end credits
You'll be waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for your feet to grow wings
That lift you above
All of those tiresome things
That you know and love
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does
Waiting for your feet to grow wings
That lift you above
All of those tiresome things
That you know and love
Waiting for the beat to kick in
But it never does."