[INTRO] (spoken)
Welcome to the end of the universe
Please fasten your galactic seatbelts as we explore the
5 Most Likely Cosmic Apocalypses
A...poca...lyp...si?

Existential dread and Euphoria can be found
Here and Here
In the inconsiderate vastness of space
Enjoy the ride

[BIG CRUNCH]

Universal Gravity
Falling fruit from apple tree
Though it is the weakest force
It just might kill all of us
Andromeda galaxy
Hurling at amazing speeds
The Milky Way pulling close
Colliding in a brilliant burst

But if you didn’t know
This violеnt destruction has got nothing on
The Big Crunch
The Big Bang blеw it all apart
Flying fast and flying far
But gravity in its infinite range
Could lead to a directional change
Collapsing in on itself
Surfaces of stars igniting, ouch!
Explosions tear through stellar space
Hot plasma in your face
It’s The Big Crunch

Where nothing can survive
Densities and temperatures beyond measure
We’re going to die
More intense than the Big Bang
And if gravity doesn’t win
The opposite will soon begin

[HEAT DEATH]

Oh it’s getting kinda cold
Which is weird for a thing called a heat death
But the entropy’s only increasing

It’s gonna be slow devastation
Cause it turns out the rate of expansion
Is way faster than we once imagined
Distance galaxies wander and fade away
Darkness grows as we float ever isolated
All thanks to the cosmological constant of dark energy

Heat death, it’s a really cold
Heat death, yeah we’re all alone
Energy gradients fade away
Particles of matter all decay

It’s a
Heat Death, the arrow of time is gone
Heat Death, one giant cold heat

[BIG RIP] (spoken)
Of course if dark energy is not constant we get 'phantom energy'
Which means we have an accelerating expansion at an increasing rate
Give us the Big Rip
Where gravity can’t keep up
Stars and planets are pulled apart
Atomic forces no longer hold
Molecules break apart
Atoms break down
Everything explodes into infinity away from everything else
And the fabric of space is ripped apart

[VACUUM DECAY] (sung)
Ever heard of the Higgs Field?
We’re talking Bosons getting revealed
Giving mass to our particles
Writing tons of articles
Giving us stability

Well this field seeks the lowest energy state
Like a ball rolling down a hill can’t wait
But if a lower potential exists
Say goodbye to our constants
Physics falls apart and we get

Vacuum Decay
We’re in a false vacuum
A false vacuum
The best data suggests we’re in a false vacuum

Evaporation of a black hole
Could trigger change that’s out of control
Entering the true low vacuum state
And a bubble it will make
Spreading all across the universe

But it’s impossible to see this moment coming
At the speed of light it’s moving, you ain’t running
The final apocalyptic cascade
Nature fully rearranged
Incinerating everything it’s

Vacuum Decay
We’re in a false vacuum
A false vacuum
The best data suggests we’re in a false vacuum
Vacuum Decay
We’re in a false vacuum
A false vacuum
The best data suggests we’re in a false vacuum

[BOUNCE]

There’s something awry here
An error or two
Either gravity’s broken
Or another dimension’s leaked through
Cause it’s weakness, the force
It just doesn’t add up

What if instead of just ours there are more?
Universes out in spacetime galore
Influencing, softly dancing
Ready to bounce
Ready to bounce

Oh these parallel branes are expanding to start
But then fate as it goes just can’t keep them apart
We’re obliterated as the scalar fields swing
Into radiation and restart the Big Bang

So what’s the world without you?
It ends but then it cycles on through
The universe born again new
So tell me what’s the world without you?
If another one’s bouncing in soon

(spoken)
Now I know some of you might be saying
“Gosh Mitch! All these possible endings
It’s got me scared, should I be worried?”
Awh, don’t worry
Most of these are predicted to happen in billions of years, if ever
And if that has you saying
“Billions? But that makes me feel so small and insignificant”
Well…that’s because you are

(sung)
So what’s the world without you?
It ends but then it cycles on through
The universe born again new
So tell me what’s the world without you?
If another one’s bouncing in soon