The Return of Sathington Willoughby

[Sound of cheering crowd]



Fellow colleagues!

Distinguished members of the press!

Ladies and gentlemen



I'd like to take this opportunity

To personally and humbly

Thank each and every one of you

For joining us

At this particular event



It is my hope

That we can utilize

This meeting of the minds

To successfully convey

The essence

Of our platform

To you

A grand and noble audience



As I look out among the faces

I reflect

Finding console

In the words of Franklin Delano Roosevelt

Who said:

"We have nothing to fear

But fear itself."



Paranoia is a disease unto itself

And may I add:

The person standing next to you

May not be

Who they appear

To be

So take precautions!



"A mind is a terrible thing to waste."

This is true!

Many a young person has fallen prey

To the substances that alter the perspective

Of any right-thinking individual



The problem with the youth today

Is ... because of their

Inexperience with the world

They cannot

Attempt to grasp

The ideals

Set forth

By myself and those who

Preceded me



But ... as history has shown ...

They will come around

And ... embrace

Our philosophies

And ... become

Model citizens in their own right



God bless this great nation