Christmas, that magic time of the year, mom and dad are glad everyone's here
Grandpa is busy trimming the tree and aunty made a fruitcake naturally
But her fruitcake ain't the only one at the table
And there's something that I just have to say
"Granny pass the stuffing if you are able
And by the way mom and dad, I'm gay"

Yeah I brought a girl with me but I paid her to be here
Hey mom and dad that's what they call a beard
I try to make it work but the girl ain't got the gear
What can I say; I love it in the rear

Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out this year
Can't wait to tell the world that I'm a flamin' queer
Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out today
And here's your Christmas present, mom and dad I'm gay

Take back those G.I. Joes I never liked those toys
I never did like stuff that was for boys
Bring me some Barbies although you think it's wrong
Or better yet Johnny Depp in a thong

Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out this year
Can't wait to tell the world that I'm a flamin' queer
Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out today
And here's your Christmas present, mom and dad I'm gay
Don't look so surprised to know
It's not like I'm the only homo
Aunty Jen's a lesbian (she is?)
And I've been felt by Uncle Joe

Well now I don't expect for you to like what you've been told
And if you hate me well that's how it goes
Well as for me I'm off to a disco and you can kiss my gay ass as I go

Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out this year
Can't wait to tell the world that I'm a flamin' queer
Comin' out for Christmas
Comin' out today
And here's your Christmas present, mom and dad I'm wonderfully, fabulously, gargantuanly gay