[FREDRIK]
Now
As the sweet imbecilities
Tumble so lavishly
Onto her lap...

[ANNE, spoken]
Oh Fredrik, what a day it's been. Unending drama. How Petra... 

[FREDRIK]
Now
There are two possibilities
A, I could ravish her
B, I could nap...

[ANNE, spoken]
That grumpy old Miss Nordstrom from next door? Her sister's coming for a visit. 

[FREDRIK]
Say
It's the ravishment, then we see
The option
That follows, of course:

[ANNE, spoken]
I do hope I'm imperious enough with the servants. I try to be, but half the time I think they're laughing at me. 
[FREDRIK]
A
The deployment of charm, or B
The adoption
Of physical force...

[ANNE, spoken]
And Amalia jabbering on for hours and hours

[FREDRIK]
Now, B might arouse her
But if I assume
I trip on my trouser
Leg crossing the room

[ANNE, spoken]
I can't tell you how boring it was. I'd rather have a tooth pulled. 

[FREDRIK]
Her hair getting tangled
Her stays getting snapped
My nerves would be jangled
My energy sapped...

[ANNE, spoken]
You should have seen Mrs. Erling in the fish market. 
[FREDRIK]
Removing her clothing
Would take me all day
And her subsequent loathing
Would turn me away
Which eliminates B
And which leaves us with A...

[ANNE, spoken]
Could you ever be jealous of me? Could you? Like the Moor of Venice?

[FREDRIK]
Now
Insofar as approaching it
What would be festive
But have its effect?

[ANNE, spoken]
Shall I learn Italian? I think it'd be amusing, if the verbs aren't too irregular. 

[FREDRIK]
Now, there are two ways of broaching it
A, the suggestive
And B, the direct...

[ANNE, spoken]
But then French is a much chicer language. Everyone says so. Parlez-vous français?
[FREDRIK]
Say
That I settle on B, to wit
A charmingly
Lecherous mood...

[ANNE, spoken]
I know you like my hair this way. But on top of my head, like a siren... 

[FREDRIK]
A
I could put on my nightshirt or sit
Disarmingly
B, in the n***...

[ANNE, spoken]
Oh Fredrik, you should have seen the great arrival

[FREDRIK]
That might be effective
My body's all right
But not in perspective
And not in the light

[ANNE, spoken]
Poor Henrik! How comical he looked. 

[FREDRIK]
I'm bound to be chilly
And feel a buffoon
But nightshirts are silly
In mid-afternoon...

[ANNE, spoken]
Why are virtuous people so stingy?

[FREDRIK]
Which leaves the suggestive
But how to proceed?
Although she gets restive
Perhaps I could read...

[ANNE, spoken]
He gave the coachman the tiniest tip!

[FREDRIK]
In view of her penchant
For something romantic
De Sade is too trenchant
And Dickens too frantic
And Stendhal would ruin
The plan of attack
As there isn't much blue in
The Red and The Black

[ANNE, spoken]
The poor man was so sad. 

[FREDRIK]
De Maupassant's candor
Would cause her dismay
The Brontés are grander
But not very gay
Her taste is much blander
I'm sorry to say
But is Hans Christian Ander-
Sen ever risque?
Which eliminates A...

[ANNE, spoken]
And he said "You're such a pretty lady." Wasn't that silly of him?

[FREDRIK]
Now
With my mental facilities
Partially muddied
And ready to snap...

[ANNE, spoken]
I'm sure about the bracelet. But earrings, earrings! Oh, which earrings?

[FREDRIK]
Now
Though there are possibilities
Still to be studied
I might as well nap...

[ANNE, spoken]
Mother's rubies? Or the diamonds? Agony. 

[FREDRIK]
Bow
Though I must
To adjust
My original plan...

[ANNE, spoken]
Desiree Armfeldt. I just know she'd wear the most glamorous gowns. 

[FREDRIK]
How
Shall I sleep
Half as deep
As I usually can?...

[ANNE, spoken]
Dear distinguished old Fredrik...

[FREDRIK]
When now I still want and/or love you
Now as always
Now
Anne...