Stephen Sondheim
Gossip
[CELESTE #1]
They say that George has another woman

[CELESTE #2]
I'm not surprised

[CELESTE #1]
They say that George only lives with tramps

[CELESTE #2]
I'm not surprised

[CELESTE #1]
They say he prowls through the streets
In his top hat after midnight—

[CELESTE #2, spoken]
No!

[CELESTE #1]
—And stands there staring up at the lamps

[CELESTE #2]
I'm not surprised

[CELESTES #1 & #2]
Artists are so crazy...
[OLD LADY]
Those girls are noisy

[NURSE, spoken]
Yes, Madame. 

[OLD LADY]
That man is famous

[NURSE, spoken]
Yes, Madame. 

[OLD LADY]
That man is filthy

[NURSE, spoken]
Your son seems to find him interesting. 

[OLD LADY]
That man's deluded

[CELESTES #1 & #2]
Artists are so crazy

[OLD LADY & NURSE]
Artists are so peculiar
[CELESTE #1]
Slouching...

[BOATMAN]
Over-privileged women
Complaining
Silly little simpering
Shopgirls
Condescending artists
"Observing,"
"Perceiving..."
Well, screw them!

[CELESTES #1 & #2, OLD LADY, NURSE & BOATMAN]
Artists are so—

[CELESTE #2]
—Crazy

[CELESTE #1]
—Secretive

[BOATMAN]
—High and mighty

[NURSE]
—Interesting
[OLD LADY, spoken]
—Unfeeling