[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
SLENDER MAN
VS
JEFF THE KILLER
BEGIN

[Verse 1: Slender Man]
Prepare for "The Arrival" of the faceless king of horror
I'll knock you harder then when you fell on the bathroom floor
You’re just a prepubescent child who has no meaning of fright
I scare all who happen to spot me in the night
Nothing can match my length, I spit diminishing and dark
I've got swarms of arms coming at you, prepared to leave a mark
Emo hair and white hoodie? No class to be found
Were your talents scarred as well? Because your rhymes are profound

[Verse 2: Jeff the Killer]
You're a pedophile, chasing little kids through town
Lеgend says you kill, but I’m the best killеr around
What's with those tentacles? You're like a living hentai
A photobomb whose only popularity comes from PewDiePie
You're known from fake document, just look at Marble Hornets
Driving people crazy, no wonder you've never had a duet
You may be called a man, but I'm more killer than you
As for your face; I'll bleach it, ignite it, and give it a redo
[Verse 3: Slender Man]
They call me Slender Man because I get all them bitches
See, I'm a man, you’re a kid who can’t write any disses
You're rip off of Dahmer, and he’s more effective
You ass got burnt, bitch, you're literally defective
How the hell are you considered scary? Your balls haven't dropped
And the most action you've ever had was at a bus stop
I don’t need to try against you, you wouldn't last in my maze
You must be getting claustrophobic, now taste my static haze

[Verse 4: Jeff the Killer]
I can see right through you, you're not scary at all
You may be slender, but I'm the one who's standing tall
I'll choke you with your black tie, no lie
Then beat your faceless ass until you finally die
You won't put up a fight, I'll make you need Hospice
Come at me, and I'll rip right off your Slender dick
Don't give me your crap, bitch, you're done! You're old news
How sad! They made a Teletubby scarier than you

[Interlude: Hoody]
Now hold on a second!

[Verse 5: Hoody & Masky]
It's Hoody and Masky, we bring horror you won't believe
Ain't no cameras here, so that means you better leave
We'll rip up your pages, then leave you in flames
You both have no family, and now it's your turn to get maimed
You've got long arms, and you've got no eyelids
And both of you freaks always go after kids
What a lame excuse, no eyes. You can still see
That we'll kill you just like your whole family
[Interlude: Eyeless Jack]
(Ha, ha, ha, ha!)

[Verse 6: Eyeless Jack]
It's Eyeless Jack here, so get ready for your doom!
You know your death is ready when I sneak into your room
Rip out your liver, you won't be needing this in your grave
Walking around the woods at night, you think you're so brave
Slender Man, you don't scare me, Jeff, you're just a bitch
I'll make Hoody and Masky my death slaves like my buddy Mitch
I'm the creepypasta king, you feel a loss to the Boss
And I don't even need eyes just to see that you've lost

[Verse 7: Smile Dog]
Spread the word, you bitches lost to this number one dog
You pussies are only scary because you hide in the fog
Meanwhile, I'll restyle you hostile pedophiles to jump miles
Get ready, cause you assholes are gonna see a hell of a smile
I can't understand how you pussies are considered horror
A twig, a child, pathetic twins and a sightless explorer
You can't beat me. I'm more badass than you all combined
All five of you could never handle this demonic canine

[Interlude: SCP Foundation Intercom]
SCP-173 has escaped, we're putting the foundation on lock!
[Verse 8: SCP-173]
You D-Class losers, wipe away that smile
I'm SCP-173, animate and hostile
I'm a class Keter threat; you're all Euclid at best
Special Victory Procedures: beating you all to death
No use Containing or Protecting your insecurities
Blink once and you're dead, I'm like an angel that weeps
Neck snap, get back; I'm having too much fun
As soon as I'm in the arena, you'll all be [DATA EXPUNGED]

[Verse 9: BEN]
You shouldn't have done that, it's time to give you a frown
I'm back for good bitches! And this time I won't drown
I go by the name of Ben, I'm everyone's thriller
I've come to this battle to destroy you pathetic excuses for killers
You all will suffer and I'll make sure the media will see
I'll record your deaths, then upload it as a WMV
Half of you are just pussies who can't handle a face revealing
Now let me conclude this battle with the Song of Unhealing

[Verse 10: MissingNO]
Back from the island, it's MissingNO, here to fight
I'm the bitching glitching witch who will show you true fight
I'll crunch you, prisoner, 128 times
And Smile, I'll crush your floppy disk with my glitching rhymes
Hoody, Masky, and Slendy? I can't make your stories worse
And Jack and Jeff? Ha! Sounds like a Mother Goose verse
You all need to watch out, for when M truly arrives
You'll be destroyed like a Marowak as I corrupt your lives

[Verse 11: Zalgo]
(HA HA HA HA HA!)
Enough with your petty rhymes, it's time for you all to suffer
My presence is so purely evil, the thought of my rhymes MAKES YOU SHUDDER
You're always hiding in your forest so nobody sees you cry
And you, I'll spit bleach at and BURN YOUR INSIDES
Hoody and Masky, you two are just assholes
Dressing up like little faggots as I STEAL YOUR SOULS
And Jacky Boy, I think it's time for you to see
That nobody gives a shit about your crappy story
Smile Dog, you're a puppy! I'm the MAD DOG OF MADNESS
You bring suicidal thoughts, but I'll BRING YOU TO SADNESS
And SCP? Nobody knows what you are
Some experiment covered in feces and scars?
BEN, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE DONE THAT! I'll diss you to death
You're a statue of Link who won't take another breath
HELL NO, MISSINGNO, YOU'RE JUST A LITTLE BITCH
Call yourself the master of corruption, but you're nothing but a glitch
Nine Lives Taken at my demonic laughter
You're in my realm bow down to, ZALGO, YOUR MASTER

[Outro]
Who won...?
Who's next...?
You decide...
Epic Rap... Battle Parodies...