[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
GORDON RAMSAY
VS
SIMON COWELL
BEGIN

[Verse 1: Simon Cowell]
Time to spit rhymes so fiery, you'll be letting out a howl
Cause this pissy chef is about to get some one-on-one time with Simon Cowell
You can't cook shit, even if it's literally a big steaming pile of turds
You're from Shakespeare's hometown, but you're terrible with words
I'm rich and influential, you can't buy me, calm your racket
Why are you yelling at chefs when you couldn't even win a black jacket?
I fucking hate you and all your shows because it's just an act, your
Rhymes suck, but I got what it takes, I guess you could say I have the X Factor

[Verse 2: Gordon Ramsay]
JP, open Hell's Kitchen, it's time to smash in this asshole's jaw
What the fuck are you doing, Syco? Your rhymes are fucking raw
Oh, I've seen your shows, you're not a judge, you're a first-class whiner
Get your act together, dick-face, this isn't a fucking fast food diner
I've written tons of books and been on shit-tons of shows
Red or black? Pfft, it's not like I'd expect you to fucking know
You married a make-up artist? What the fuck is wrong with your face?
Evidently, Britain's got talent, just not in your case
[Verse 3: Simon Cowell]
What in the bloody hell was that? That was dreadful, my god
Not to mention you go apeshit over one raw piece of cod
I don't mean to be rude, but your rhymes are utter trash
Calm your ass, you don't need to yell 24/7, you'll still earn cash
Shut up, Whore-don Ramsay, and for God's sake, quit your bitchin'
Quit trying to rap, just grab a tampon and get back to the kitchen
Your restaurants don't have such great reviews, uh-oh
And your raps are just so damn awful, even Paula would say no

[Verse 4: Gordon Ramsay]
Me, awful? You can't even tell if someone can't sing
If I can fall off a cliff and live, your rhymes won't do a fucking thing
By the end, you'll be ill, no Divo, understood?
Go back to banging fat Susan with your little piece of wood
You say you're better than me but I must make a correction
How can anyone speak positively of you? You created One Direction
Now that you have been defeated by the one and only Gordon Ramsay
Piss off, get the fuck out, you're done, okay?!

[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES