Cole Porter
Friendship
[MOON, spoken]
You know, Reno, we should have teamed up years ago. 

[RENO, spoken]
We're two of a kind, all right. 

[MOON, spoken]
Yeah. Partners!

[RENO, spoken]
Through thick or thin!

[MOON, spoken]
Night or day!

[RENO, spoken]
Right or wrong!

[MOON]
If you're ever in a jam
Here I am

[RENO]
If you ever need a pal
I'm your gal
[MOON]
If you ever feel so happy you land in jail
I'm your bail

[BOTH]
It's friendship, friendship
Just a perfect blendship
When other friendships have been forgot
Ours will still be hot
Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle, dig-dig-dig

[MOON]
If you're ever down a well
Ring my bell

[RENO]
If you ever catch on fire
Send a wire

[MOON]
If you ever lose your teeth when you're out to dine
Borrow mine

[BOTH]
It's friendship, friendship
Just a perfect blendship
When other friendships have ceased to jell
Ours will still be swell
Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle, hep-hep-hep
[RENO]
If they ever black your eyes
Put me wise

[MOON]
If they ever cook your goose
Play me loose

[RENO]
If they ever put a bullet through your brain
I'll complain

[BOTH]
It's friendship, friendship
Just a perfect blendship
When other friendships go up in smoke
Ours will still be oke
Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle, goof-goof-goof

[MOON]
If you ever lose your mind
I'll be kind

[RENO]
If you ever lose your shirt
I'll be hurt
[MOON]
If you're ever in a mill and get sawed in half
I won't laugh[RENO]
It's friendship, friendship[MOON]
Hahahaha! Hahahahaha![BOTH]
Just a perfect blendship
When other friendships have been "forgate"
Ours will still be great

[RENO]
If they ever crack your spine
Drop a line

[MOON]
If they ever cut your throat
Write a note[RENO]
If they ever make a cannibal stew of you
Invite me too

It's friendship[MOON, spoken]
What?!

What are you saying?![BOTH]
Friendship
Just a perfect blendship
When other friendships are up the crick
Ours will still be slick
Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle[MOON]
Quack-quack-quack
Quack-quack-quack
Quack-quack-quack[RENO]
Chuck-chuck-chuck
 
Quack-quack-quack?![Moon and Reno argue, talking over each other.][MOON, spoken]
Remember?
Yeah, we rehearsed quack-quack-quack. 
Yes, it was a long time ago. 
 
 
You don't wanna do it?[RENO, spoken]
No, no, no, that's not–
That's not what we rehearsed. 
 
Oh my gosh. And now you're changing the rules, you're cutting me off!
What are you doing?
I don't wanna do it![BOTH]
When other friendships have been forgot
Ours will still be hot