(Verse)
At words poetic, I'm so pathetic
That I always have found it best
Instead of getting 'em off my chest
To let 'em rest unexpressed
I hate parading my serenading
As I'll probably miss a bar
But if this ditty is not so pretty
At least it'll tell you how great you are

(Chorus 1)
You're the top
You're the Colosseum
You're the top
You're the Louvre Museum
You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss
You're a Bendel bonnet, a Shakespeare sonnet
You're Mickey Mouse

You're the Nile
You're the Tow'r of Pisa
You're the smile
On the Mona Lisa
I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top
(Chorus 2)
You're the top
You're Mahatma Gandhi
You're the top
You're Napoleon brandy
You're the purple light of a summer night in Spain
You're the National Gallery, you're Garbo's salary
You're cellophane

You're sublime
You're a turkey dinner
You're the time
Of the Derby winner
I'm a toy balloon that's fated soon to pop
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top

(Chorus 3)
You're the top
You're an Arrow collar
You're the top
You're a Coolidge dollar
You're the nimble tread of the feet of Fred Astaire
You're an O'Neill drama, you're Whistler's mama
You're Camembert
You're a rose, you're Inferno's Dante
You're the nose on the great Durante
I'm just in the way as the French would say
"De trop"
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top

(Chorus 4)
You're the top
You're a Waldorf salad
You're the top
You're a Berlin ballad
You're a baby grand of a lady and a gent
You're an old dutch master, you're Mrs. Aster
You're Pepsodent

You're romance
You're the steppes of Russia
You're the pants
On a Roxy usher
I'm a lazy lout that's just about to stop
But if baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top

(Chorus 5)
You're the top!
You're a Ritz hot toddy
You're the top!
You're a Brewster body
You're the boats that glide on the sleepy Zuider Zee
You're a Nathan panning, you're Bishop Manning
You're broccoli
You're a prize
You're a night at Coney
You're the eyes
Of Irene Bordoni
I'm a broken doll, a fol-de-rol, a blop
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top

(Chorus 6)
You're the top!
You're a dance in Bali
You're the top!
You're a hot tamale
You're an angel, you simply too, too, too diveen
You're a Botticelli, you're Keats, you're Shelley
You're Ovaltine

You're a boon
You're the dam at Boulder
You're the moon
Over Mae West's shoulder
I'm a nominee of the G.O.P. or GOP
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top!

(Chorus 7)
You're the top!
You're the Tower of Babel
You're the top!
You're the Whitney Stable
By the River Rhine, you're a sturdy stein of beer
You're a dress from Saks's, you're next year's taxes,'
You're stratosphere

You're my thoist
You're a Drumstick Lipstick
You're da foist
In da Irish svipstick
I'm a frightened frog that can find no log to hop
But if, baby, I'm the bottom
You're the top!